Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the modern era, there has been a growing debate on whether parents should encourage their children to take part in activities or children should take part in activities by thier own. Some people believe that parents should tell their children to take part in group activities , while others argue that students should learn how to occupy themselves in organised activities. I completely agree with the given statement that parents should encourage their children to participate in organised group activities. I shall discuss relevent ideas and examples in the following paragraphs.

On the one hand, major reason is that it helps to cultivate communication skills of their children. This is because children can learn to engage between groups and people. As a result, it can help to build their confidence which is very crucial. For example, there are so many debate competitions available for children to learn about various things.

Moreover, activities such as, sports competitions, environmental campaigns. As a result, children's holistic growth could improve step by step in a manner. Not only does this help children overall growth, but it also contributes to their academic curriculum. Due to this, students can connect these ideas in studies and get good score in exams.For instance, from very small age child can become mature and environmental friendly.

To conclude, although children should learn how to engage themselves in activities, parents always know what is better for their children for learning. Communication skills and campaigns has played a majoe role in every children lives.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both views and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is limited. While you mention communication skills and holistic growth, the arguments lack depth and specific, well-explained examples. For instance, the mention of 'debate competitions' is a good start, but it is not fully linked to the prompt's core tension between group activities and independent play. The second view (learning to occupy oneself) is largely ignored in the body paragraphs, which is a requirement of the 'discuss both views' instruction. To improve, ensure each perspective is given balanced attention and that your arguments are supported by more detailed reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression. You use some cohesive devices like 'On the one hand', 'Moreover', and 'To conclude'. However, the flow is sometimes mechanical, and the connection between sentences is occasionally weak. For example, the transition between the benefits of sports and the impact on academic curriculum is abrupt. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the link between 'campaigns' and 'every children lives' is vague. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You use some relevant terms like 'cultivate', 'holistic growth', and 'academic curriculum', which is positive. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and minor errors, such as 'engage between groups' (should be 'engage with groups') and 'relevent' (spelling). The vocabulary is somewhat repetitive, and there is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic expressions. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring accurate spelling throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the fluency of the writing. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'campaigns has played'), article usage (e.g., 'from very small age'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'children should take part in activities by thier own'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma placement. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like pluralisation and article usage to ensure your complex structures are error-free.

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