Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some portion of population says that parents should motivate their children to participate in organised group activities in their leisure time. Some believe that is it significant to let the kids learn how to accompany their self independently. In my point of view both plays equally crucial for child's personal and emotional thrives.

On the one hand, anticipation in structured activity plays a huge role in person's life. this will beneficial for their growth and development. It will encourage child to keep discipline and determined. Organised activity such as, music classes, sports, dance classes and social participation helps them to gain more exposure and learn about the norms and Castoms of society. For instance, taking part in social function let them acquire quality like communication, decision making, leadership and team spirit.

On the other hand, child should learn something in their spare time. such as, reading books, drawing , singing and anything they are fond of. This will fruitful for their own development and growth. This skills help them to become more creative and master of their talent. For example, a child who spend their time in singing become great singer while achieving their academics.

To recapitulate, this both point of view play vital role in child's own evolvement. This creates more dedicated future talents. In addition, it will beneficial for nation as well.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which limits the depth of the discussion. While the main points are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped. For instance, the benefits of group activities are listed but not fully explained in terms of their long-term impact on a child's development. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your arguments with more detailed explanations and specific examples to ensure the response is sufficiently comprehensive.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the two body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and limited. Phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are used correctly, but the transitions between sentences within paragraphs could be smoother. Additionally, some referencing is slightly unclear, such as 'this both point of view' in the conclusion, which lacks grammatical precision.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choices or incorrect collocations, such as 'accompany their self independently' (instead of 'occupy themselves') and 'Castoms' (spelling error for 'customs'). The phrase 'emotional thrives' is also non-standard. While you attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'structured activity' and 'social participation', the overall range is limited, and errors in word formation occasionally distract the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'this both point of view play'), missing articles, and incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'this will beneficial' instead of 'this will be beneficial'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma placement. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for small errors would be highly beneficial.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.