Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Some people say that parents should encourage their children to participate in organized group activities in their free time. While others say that it is crucial for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.
Taking part in organized group activities has several advantages. First of all, children can develop team spirit, through collaborating with others as a group and working towards the same goal. In addition, it is also beneficial for children's communication skill and socialization process, which are crucial for their growth. Last but not the least, activities like football can help children to build leadership and responsibility. These experiences and skills prepare children for adult life.
Learning how to occupy themselves on their own is also an important ability. A lot of children feel lonely, boring and lost when they are alone, which may cause burden for parents. Providing children the opportunity to deal with themselves can help solve anxiety issue for both children and parents when they are apart. and can develop children's independence.
From my perspective, I believe take part in group activities is more important. The reason is
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
您的回答远低于 250 字的最低要求，这严重影响了思路的展开。虽然您介绍了论点的双方，但文章不完整；它在最后一段中间戛然而止。由于缺少结论，且论点未得到充分扩展或足够的细节支持，任务仅得到了部分完成。为了提高，您必须通过为每个观点提供具体例子，并以清晰、合理的结论重申您的立场来完成文章，从而确保达到字数要求。
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
文章分段合理，并尝试使用了 'First of all', 'In addition' 和 'From my perspective' 等基础衔接词。然而，思路的进展因文本的不完整而中断。段落之间的过渡是合乎逻辑的，但缺乏结论使整体结构显得未完成。为了提高，请确保每个段落都有清晰的主题句，并使用更多样化的连接词，使您的观点在整篇文章中连接得更流畅。
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
您展示了适合该任务的足够词汇量，使用了 'collaborating', 'socialization process' 和 'independence' 等术语。然而，在用词上存在一些不准确之处，例如 'feel... boring'（应为 'bored'）和 'cause burden'（应为 'be a burden'）。这些错误并未阻碍交流，但确实限制了您写作的精确度。为了达到更高的分数，请专注于使用更精确的搭配，并确保您的词形在语境中语法正确。
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
您使用了简单句和复杂句的混合，例如 'While others say that it is crucial for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.' 存在一些语法错误，例如句子碎片 'and can develop children's independence' 以及最后一段中错误地使用了 'take part' 而非 'taking part'。标点符号总体上可以接受，但最后一句的不完整是一个严重的问题。请专注于校对以发现细微错误，并确保所有句子完整。
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