Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Some believe that parents should insist their kids to participate in a group activities in their free time for their holistic development, while other believes that children will learn more by on their own. I agree that involving kids in a group activities is important for their character building and traits.

On the one hand, kids who involve in group activities are bound to share more and become more open-minded. For instance, kids who plays with other kids tends to share their toys to other kids. They will be open to share easily and will become extrovert, who does not have public speaking fear. Additionally, group activities also teach them to become more patient. To add more, it is important for pupils to involve in the group activities as it helps in their overall development because they will learn how to deal with different type of people.

On the other hand, kids who spend their leisure time alone are more likely to master their skills as they can concentrate well. For instance, pupil who learn how to be engaged by themselves are less likely to become depressed in the future as they know how to handle pressure on their own. Furthermore, kids who spend love their company are less likely to be affected by bad influence and will become calm and composed.

To conclude, I believe playing with group of children is more beneficial for kids as it has a beneficial impact on child's brain because it boosts their confidence and improves few traits like self awareness. Not only does this help kids to become independent but it also helps them to fight their own battle.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. For example, the argument regarding group activities focuses heavily on 'sharing' and 'confidence' without exploring broader social or cognitive benefits. Similarly, the section on solitary play is limited to 'mastering skills' and 'avoiding bad influence'. While the prompt is addressed, the supporting points are somewhat generic and could be extended with more specific, real-world examples to reach a higher band. The position is consistent throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore' are used to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. There are minor issues with referencing; for instance, the transition 'To add more' is not standard academic phrasing. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different viewpoints, which helps the overall flow of the argument. The progression of ideas is generally clear, though the links between sentences could be more varied.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choices or collocations, such as 'insist their kids to participate' (should be 'encourage their kids to participate') and 'extrovert, who does not have public speaking fear' (should be 'extroverted and less fearful of public speaking'). The phrase 'spend love their company' is also grammatically incorrect and confusing. While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'holistic development' and 'self-awareness', the overall range remains somewhat limited.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('other believes', 'kids who plays', 'kids who spend love their company') and incorrect verb patterns ('insist their kids to participate'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are missing articles and awkward phrasing throughout. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. More attention to basic grammatical rules and proofreading would significantly improve the score.

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