Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Many people speak that nowadays should motivate their kids to involove in group games in their leasure time but opponents say that it is beneficial for newborns to understand how to control themselves on their own. Both oppinion are very serious for child because in group activities child learned many goode things on other hand some child do many bad things there are many benifits but also many disadvantges. But i think people should courage their child to spend their time in group activities.
When child spend their free time alone also they learned the occupy on their on because they think there are no anyone to help for us. But some times child feel alone in their problems and when they alone they overthinking at the end the rsuelt they got deppresed and destory their all life in many cases some child got a mind and heart pateint. Few year ago, I mostly like to spend time alone in this case, I feel tired all time and weak and i do overthinking all time but after some time, I changed my routine then a long period of time, I feel normal around about after 1 year.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you attempt to address both sides of the argument and provide a personal opinion, the discussion is underdeveloped and lacks depth. For example, the points regarding the benefits of group activities and the risks of isolation are mentioned but not sufficiently explained or supported with clear examples. To improve, you must expand your arguments with more detailed reasoning and ensure you meet the length requirement to allow for a full exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear structure. Paragraphing is insufficient, and the transition between ideas is often abrupt or confusing. While there are some attempts at cohesive devices such as 'on the other hand' and 'but', the overall flow is hindered by the lack of logical progression. The ideas are presented in a somewhat disjointed manner, making it difficult for the reader to follow your line of reasoning. Improving your use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea will help improve the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, which restricts your ability to express complex ideas. There are several instances of incorrect word choice and spelling errors, such as 'involove', 'leasure', 'oppinion', and 'pateint'. You rely on basic vocabulary, such as 'good things' and 'bad things', which lacks the precision required for a higher band score. To improve, focus on learning synonyms and collocations related to child development and social interaction, and pay closer attention to the spelling of common words.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Both oppinion are'), incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'child learned'), and sentence structure (e.g., 'Many people speak that nowadays should motivate'). The use of punctuation is also inconsistent, and many sentences are run-on or fragmented. To reach a higher band, you need to focus on mastering basic sentence structures, ensuring correct subject-verb agreement, and practicing the use of complex sentences with accurate punctuation.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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