Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
According to some individuals, parents ought to motivate their offspring to participate in tasks that involve a bunch of people, whereas, others believe that children should focus solely on themselves during their leisure time. This essay will discuss both views before I provide my perception.
On the one hand, some people think that encouraging young children to take part in group activities can broaden their horizons. In other words, it can not only boost their confidence but can also improve their communication skills, which can play a crucial role in fostering their cognitive development. Consequently, it can benefit them later on to look for an employment as such skills are highly necessary to have for job applicants. For example, as per recent survey done by researchers, those who actively engage themselves with others during their primary education, often face less challenges to get a job compared to others.
On the other hand, skeptics think that children who occupy themselves on their own are highly independent. This is because they can tackle any situation without asking for help from others, which boosts their independency. It can keep them away from unnecessary competition which is normal in group activities. To be more specific, they would not face peer pressure while performing a particular task as they are not dealing with their mates. However, I still support the former view because I think it is extremely significant to get involved with your peers. Failure to do so may make them struggle to co-ordinate with their colleagues in the professional environment.
To conclude, although many argue that children who are focused on themselves do not depend on others and also do not face peer pressure, it is very important for one to be involved in group tasks for their personal development.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.0 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant and generally well-developed. For instance, the argument regarding the development of communication skills for future employment is a strong, logical point. However, the development of the second view—that independent play fosters independence—could be slightly more nuanced. While the essay covers the requirements well, the supporting examples, such as the reference to a 'recent survey,' are a bit generic. To reach a higher band, providing more specific or detailed real-world examples would strengthen the overall argument.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The progression of ideas is smooth, and the writer uses cohesive devices effectively, such as 'On the one hand,' 'Consequently,' and 'To conclude.' Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different viewpoints. The referencing is generally clear, and the flow between sentences is natural. There is no evidence of mechanical or repetitive use of linking words, which indicates a good command of organizational structure. The essay is easy to follow from start to finish.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary is sufficient for the task and allows for some flexibility. The writer uses some good collocations and phrases such as 'broaden their horizons,' 'fostering their cognitive development,' and 'professional environment.' There are some minor issues with word choice, such as 'independency' (the standard form is 'independence') and 'a bunch of people' (which is slightly informal for an essay). However, these errors do not impede communication. The range is adequate to convey precise meaning, and the writer attempts to use more sophisticated vocabulary throughout the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is good control over grammar, and most sentences are error-free. For example, the use of conditional-like structures and complex clauses is generally accurate. There are a few minor errors, such as 'face less challenges' (should be 'fewer challenges') and 'look for an employment' (should be 'look for employment'). These are occasional slips that do not interfere with the reader's understanding. The punctuation is generally correct, and the overall grammatical control is solid.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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