Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Activities playing very crucial role in life of every person. Their are numerous individuals who think children's parents should give importance to send their children in organised group in their leisure time but some thinks they give chance to their children to do whatever they want to do to busy themselves.

To extent the parents have and important role in their children life so they want their children should take part in activities that are organise because this help to them to busy themselves in outdoor activities. With the help of this children's mind become more sharp. In addition, majority of children spend their time on electronic devices so it is a great way to keep away them from these devices. For instance, Canadian people send their children to the sports, swimming and other learning activities group so that they can use their mind on good things instead of using on video games and on other social media apps.

However, every child have a different taste for everything like some like to spend time on reading books and others like to painting. If they spend their free time according to their preference so they can give more focus on those things. Moreover, this will help to children to learn how they can utillize their free time in great way as well as if they things according to their interest they can also make career on those specific activities. for example, most of American parents allow their children to use their free time according to their own perception like in painting so after some time they will grow their career in painting line.

In my opinion, parents should allow their children to choose activities by themselves so they can know in which things they are interested as well they can also know how they can utillize their time in best way which is also very greatfull for their future.

To sum it up, however children should join the organised activities group for spending their free time in great but if they use their time according to their own taste they will know which things are good and how they have to spend their time in best way.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth. For instance, the argument regarding 'electronic devices' is mentioned but not fully explored in terms of the long-term benefits of group activities. Similarly, the point about children choosing their own activities is supported by a general example, but the explanation remains superficial. To reach a higher band, you should focus on providing more nuanced reasoning and specific, well-integrated examples that directly support your main points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'However', and 'To sum it up'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as the transition 'To extent' at the beginning of the second paragraph, which is grammatically incorrect and disrupts the flow. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, making some sentences feel disjointed. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words will help the essay read more naturally.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is limited and often repetitive. You frequently use basic phrases like 'do whatever they want' or 'good things'. There are also some word-choice errors, such as 'greatfull' (grateful) and 'utillize' (utilize), which suggest a need for more attention to spelling and precise word usage. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to child development and education, and avoid repeating the same simple adjectives throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('every child have', 'some thinks'), article usage ('in the sports'), and awkward phrasing ('help to them to busy themselves'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader. You should focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like pluralisation and verb forms to improve your accuracy.

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