Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Youngsters are the root of the any nation, because the growth of the country depends on them. Therefore, it is a debatable issue whether Children should join the organised group activities in the free time or busy themselves by their own. However, according to me, both statements are true in there own ways.

To begin with, not only teenagers can learn various skills from the experts in the group, but also can get a valuable experience from other people, even these activities helps children develop their fine motor skills. As a result, these skills may be help further to build their career in their life as well as in the hard situations in the life they can save their life through these skills without seeking anyone's help. Although, the organised group can teach children who deal with problems, if teenagers have made any mistake while learning time , they can do one activity multiples of time until they get prefect in it and the feedback could be given time to time so that children can find out where they are lacking.

Despite having aforementioned reasons, since Children spend time with their own selves, they can learn better about themselves by self-actualizations. As a result, adolescents can find out about their like-dislikes, creativity, full potential as well as purpose of life. So, kids also need to spend quality of time with their own selves.

In conclusion, based on the aforementioned reasoning, I still affirm that, it is only depend on the children where they want to go in their life and what they want to do, we cannot force them, so both ways are beneficial for the children's overall growth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the task. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the argument regarding group activities focuses on 'fine motor skills' and 'career building' without explaining how these specific activities foster such outcomes. Similarly, the point about self-actualization is mentioned but lacks concrete examples or deeper exploration. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments would benefit from more depth and specific real-world examples to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'Despite having aforementioned reasons', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or awkward, such as 'Despite having aforementioned reasons'. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the phrase 'these skills may be help further to build their career', where the antecedent for 'these skills' is slightly vague. Overall, the progression of ideas is coherent, but the flow could be more natural.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'self-actualizations' and 'aforementioned', though these are sometimes used slightly inaccurately or in a way that feels forced. There are also some minor errors in word choice, such as 'learning time' instead of 'the learning process' and 'prefect' instead of 'perfect'. To improve, the student should focus on more natural collocations and precise word usage.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'the growth of the country depends on them' (article usage), 'busy themselves by their own' (preposition error), 'these activities helps' (subject-verb agreement), and 'it is only depend on the children' (incorrect verb form). These errors are persistent throughout the text. Increasing the accuracy of basic grammar and refining complex sentence construction will help improve the score.

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