Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The grasping power of children in early age is unstoppable. Getting involved in other organized group activities after daily tasks is beneficial to them. While, working on personal skill development is also important part of individual's future life.

I will discuss on these both aspects from my experience.

When I was in school, i used to take part in any extra or any group activities like playing sports, learning music, to get into competitions such as drawing or dance. All these activities were helpful to me for building confidence and to stay motivated even if i not win. These works well with physical well-being and fosters teamwork. As i believe winning is not important but taking part in every activity makes you a better version of yourself by working with different people, you learn a lot from each other. I do like to sit in cafe with friends while workings as it gives aura of relaxation and positivity that helps you stay distant from stress in this busy world.

This contradicts with learning how to occupy by own. My parents have taught me to focus on your weak tasks more to achieve good results and to be more clear about your own future by working on oneself. However, i realised sitting and working alone will make it hard for me to keep in touch with others or socialization that plays important role when you are building career. Learning and occupying by self will make person unrecognisable after sometime.

To conclude this, I recommend to work in group is more preferable if you want to improve yourself daily. Also, those who feel comfortable with themselves should go for group works once in a while to make new friends.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The first body paragraph effectively uses personal experience to support the benefits of group activities. The second body paragraph, which discusses the importance of working alone, is less clear; the argument that 'learning and occupying by self will make person unrecognisable' is confusing and lacks logical development. While the prompt is addressed, the explanation of the second viewpoint is underdeveloped and occasionally contradictory, which limits the overall impact of the argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or inaccurate. For example, the transition 'This contradicts with learning how to occupy by own' is awkward and does not effectively link the previous paragraph to the new one. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the use of 'These works well' without a clear antecedent. While the structure is generally coherent, the flow between sentences and paragraphs could be improved with more varied and precise linking words.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. There are several instances of unnatural phrasing, such as 'grasping power of children' and 'aura of relaxation'. Some word choices are imprecise, such as 'unrecognisable' when the intended meaning was likely 'isolated' or 'socially inept'. While the meaning is generally clear, the range of vocabulary is limited, and there is a reliance on basic expressions that prevents the essay from demonstrating a more sophisticated command of English.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's flow. Common issues include missing articles (e.g., 'in early age'), subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., 'These works well'), and incorrect preposition usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the capitalization of 'i'. While the errors do not completely obscure the meaning, they are frequent enough to suggest a lack of control over complex structures, keeping the score in the 5.5 to 6.0 range.

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