Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Different activities are an indispensable part of children's life. Some emphasize parents should motivate their children to take part in organised group activities in their leisure time, some argue it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. I shall elucidate both side argument and give my opinion.
The predominant, parent should motivate their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. If children take part in group activities, they can make new friend. They must improve not only their communication skill, but also improve their leadership skill. Thus, this skills help them to make their future bright and successful. For instance, In Japan, 70% of children join group activities in their leisure time. Children develop communication as well as leadership skill. Which helps them in their further future.
Nevertheless, children should learn how to occupy themselves on their own. As children become more knowledgeable, children spend most of the time in study and develop them selves.
In my opinion, whenever youngster have time they can join group activities. So, they can join some group and all people share there opinion on the topics. Therefore, youngster create new idea on different topics. It helps them in study also. Accordingly, they must get good score in academic.
To conclude, although children can get more knowledge to spend time with themselves, joining group, they can develop communication as well as leadership skills and they can get knowledge from group people, they can improve their score in academic.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments regarding group activities are repetitive, and the section on independent activities is underdeveloped, lacking specific examples or logical depth. The conclusion merely restates the points without synthesising them effectively. To improve, you should expand on the 'why' and 'how' of your arguments, providing more detailed reasoning for why independent play is beneficial, rather than just stating that children become more knowledgeable.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'The predominant, parent should...' is an awkward opening that lacks a clear transition. Transitions like 'Thus' and 'Accordingly' are used, but they sometimes connect ideas that do not logically follow. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the connection between 'spending time with themselves' and 'improving academic scores' is not explicitly linked. More varied and natural linking words would improve the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There is significant repetition of phrases like 'take part in', 'group activities', and 'communication as well as leadership skill'. Some word choices are unnatural, such as 'further future' and 'youngster' (which should be plural 'youngsters'). While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety and occasional misuse of collocations limit the score. Using more sophisticated synonyms and precise academic vocabulary would enhance the quality of your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The predominant, parent should' instead of 'parents should'), missing articles, and incorrect pluralisation (e.g., 'make new friend'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is usually understandable, the frequency of these errors suggests a need for more careful proofreading and a better grasp of basic sentence construction and agreement rules.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.