Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is a debate that some believe that it is a responsibility of parents to engage their children in different group activities when they are free, however, others think that youngsters should have to keep themselves busy by their own. This essay will elaborate both views and as far as, I am concerned, I am in the favor of the latter view.

On the one hand, taking part in organised group activities by children such as drawing, music, sports and others would enhance their physical, and mental skills . To put it simply, guardian have to support them to take participate any of them in their leisure time , owing to this, they would focus more on their non curricular activities in which they can get a clear direction for their career. Moreover, learners learn several skills such as team work, coordination and corporation, gives and takes from these groups. Hence, parents should encourage them to ke part in organised group activities in their free time.

On the other hand, keeping busy by themselves helps to improve their creativity and intrapersonal skills. In other words, feeling bored at home in free time, forced them to think something different which they would enjoy assist their mind to do creative things. Owing to this, they polish their hidden talent. Furthermore, sometimes, during school , they do not get sufficient time to do their favourite things, by this, they can strength their knowledge . Therefore, it is import for them to learn how to keep busy themselves.

In contrast, encouraging children to utilising their precious time by parents would be beneficial for learning different interpersonal skills, while , I believe, it is more crucial for them to learn how to occupy themselves in free time which upgrading their creative nature and knowledge.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding group activities mentions 'team work' and 'coordination' but lacks specific examples or deeper explanation of how these translate into long-term benefits. Similarly, the section on independent play is a bit repetitive, focusing heavily on 'boredom' as the primary driver for creativity. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more detailed reasoning or illustrative examples. The position is consistent throughout, which is a strength.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'Furthermore' to signal transitions. However, some of these devices are used mechanically or slightly inaccurately, such as 'by this' or 'owing to this,' which occasionally disrupts the flow. The referencing is generally clear, but the connection between sentences could be smoother to ensure a more natural progression of ideas. Overall, the structure is sufficient to guide the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'intrapersonal skills,' 'curriculum,' and 'coordination.' However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'corporation' (likely meant 'cooperation'), 'give and takes,' and 'keep busy themselves.' These errors do not impede communication, but they highlight a need for more precise vocabulary usage. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and ensuring that words are used in their correct grammatical form.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb forms and prepositions (e.g., 'take participate any of them,' 'forced them to think,' 'it is import for them'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary commas appearing in several places. While these errors are noticeable, they rarely prevent the reader from understanding your intended meaning. Increasing your control over basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement will help improve your score in this area.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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