Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

A child's cognitive abilities develop a lot during the early stages of their life. While some parents encourage them to participate in group activities, others argue that they should learn to be by themselves. This essay will provide the reasons behind both the viewpoints before explaining why I agree with the former.

The ones who motivate their child in team participation argues that it is crucial to learn essential skills like communication and team management. When children take participation in activities where they have to learn how to be in a team can be helpful to develop in team management. Also, they learn to communicate efficiently within team members, which can help them in their work career in future. Foe example, as every work place has different departments and teams, it really helps them in managing project with different groups while communicating clearly.

On the other hand, some argue that children should also learn how to occupy themselves by their own. Sometimes being by their own self can help children find their hobbies. This not only helps them become self reliant, but also boost their morale after achieving their goals. Also, spending time with themselves help children to learn new skills that they might not do in team. This gives a child freedom to fully express themselves.

While both point of views has their own arguments, In my opinion, parents should encourage their children to take part in team building tasks. It not only helps them to learn importance of team work, but also helps them in their forthcoming career.

In conclusion, both of the arguments have their own benefits I still believe that youngsters should be encouraged to participate in organized group activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The position is consistent throughout the response. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding 'team management' is repetitive, and the explanation of why independent play is beneficial could be more deeply explored with specific examples. While the ideas are relevant, they lack the depth and extension required for a higher band score. The conclusion is also quite brief and does not fully synthesize the points made in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. Cohesive devices such as 'While', 'Also', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing and flow. For example, the phrase 'The ones who motivate their child' is slightly awkward, and the connection between sentences in the second paragraph could be smoother. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear, but the use of cohesive devices lacks the flexibility and sophistication of higher bands.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their meaning clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'cognitive abilities' and 'self-reliant'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'take participation' (should be 'participate') and 'work career' (should be 'career'). The repetition of words like 'team' and 'help' suggests a limited range. To improve, the student should focus on using more varied synonyms and more natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('The ones who motivate... argues' should be 'argue') and prepositional errors ('by their own' should be 'on their own'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor errors, such as the comma splice in the final paragraph. The frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band, although they do not significantly impede communication.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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