Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

A large contemporary society giving us a lot of ideas for spending our free time. As we know we are living in developing countries and we have a lot of option to spend free time on the technology. However, same as that the children of our society are also affected for this condition. some kids have their own ideas, and some are not using their brains because of technology and social media.

There are two aspects of this article, some has positive views and other are having negative views.

On the one hand, now a day's parents are very controlling about their kids, parents are always wanted to teach their kids Not only it has good habit but also it would make kids obedient. However, some children want to everything in their hands and want to do different kind of activity for their themselves. It will increase their knowledge also sharp their memory. Although this habit reduces screen time in their life. Outdoor games and doing creativity raise the personalities.

On the other hand, Student has a lot of free time in their academic planner. So, they are able to do a lot of activities in their free time. Some student need to any instructor but some are not like to involvement of anyone in their creativity. It has a lot of reason if student want to work alone, they have a freedom of choice However, if some are always needing help of their parents. Each perspective has their own qualities.

For instant, one student has used his mind but other one copy to the someone idea they both has brain but one are using it and other is neither.

In the end, each perspective has both positive and negative views but if students use his mind, knowledge and memory it will be help in every step of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument, but the development of ideas is limited and often unclear. The introduction is vague and does not clearly state a position. The body paragraphs contain relevant points, such as the benefits of independent play versus structured activities, but these are not fully extended or supported with clear examples. The conclusion is brief and lacks a strong summary of the writer's opinion. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single clear idea, supported by specific examples or logical reasoning, and maintain a consistent position throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow between and within them is often disjointed. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand', they are sometimes used incorrectly or do not effectively connect the ideas. The referencing is occasionally unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. The progression of ideas is not always logical, and the transition between the introduction, body, and conclusion feels abrupt. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each sentence logically follows the previous one will enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. There are several instances of word choice errors, such as 'affected for this condition' instead of 'affected by this condition' and 'do different kind of activity for their themselves'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas precisely. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a wider variety of topic-specific vocabulary and focus on correct collocations. Avoid using informal or vague phrasing and try to incorporate more precise academic terms to convey your points more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some has positive views'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack proper punctuation, which affects readability. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often inaccurate. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring subject-verb agreement, and using articles correctly. Proofreading for common errors like tense consistency and pluralization will also help improve the accuracy of your writing.

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