Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A lot of people have different opinions about whether they should encourage their child to take part in team activities or they have to focus on their self-time.

On the one hand, some individuals thinks that group activities play a vital role in children's development. This is to say, while spending time with self is beneficial, group tasks offers a more immersive experience. Since, kids have assess to social life, this can facilitate them to improve their self-esteem. Which is extremely crucial for child's future. To illustrate, a survey conducted by the psychologist suggested that thousands of people achieve their goal at early stage of life as their parents play a major role in childhood development and encourage them to participate in team tasks, such as sports, household responsibility, and public service.

On the other hand, opponents believe that, occupying themselves on their own is beneficial for them. In other words, self-activities allows them to think critically. Which sometimes lack in teams. They have to agreed with others points of view in some circumstances regardless have their own opinions. For instance, according to BBC news majority of young generation prefer alone time because it can helps them to improve their thinking skills in order to solve major problems.

From my perspective, engaging free time in social or group activities can assist you gain more social experience rather than limiting your boundaries.

In conclusion, although alone times help to enhance your thinking abilities, team tasks gives children sense of accomplishment and confident and I totally agree with it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding 'self-time' is supported by a vague reference to a 'BBC news' survey, which lacks specific detail. The explanation of why group activities improve self-esteem is also quite brief. To achieve a higher band, you should expand on your points with more detailed reasoning or concrete examples. While the position is clear throughout, the overall development of the arguments remains at a basic level, preventing a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly misused, such as 'This is to say' and 'Which is extremely crucial', which are used as sentence fragments. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words will help your writing feel more natural and cohesive.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. You use some relevant terms like 'immersive experience' and 'sense of accomplishment', but there are also instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'have assess to social life' (should be 'have access to') and 'engaging free time' (should be 'spending free time'). There is also some repetition of basic vocabulary. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding word-choice errors that occasionally make the meaning slightly less clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

There is a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. You make several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('some individuals thinks', 'group tasks offers', 'self-activities allows') and incorrect verb forms ('they have to agreed', 'it can helps'). Additionally, there are punctuation errors, specifically the use of sentence fragments starting with 'Which' or 'Since'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to lower the score. Focusing on basic subject-verb agreement and avoiding sentence fragments will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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