Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 7.0)

While some argue that families should motivate their offsprings to participate in team-activities in their leisure time, others think that it is crucial for them to self-entertain themselves. To my way of thinking, parents should engage children in group activities because group sessions develop interpersonal skills which contribute to cognitive development, whereas isolation might affect their mental heath negatively.

On the one hand, some think if children learn to keep themselves busy, they become self-dependent and can survive longer periods of isolation. They learn how to occupy themselves without being dependent on other people. For example, during the COVID-19 epidemic when all schools were closed for three months, children learnt to entertain themselves by playing and learning new things their on their digital devices. However, it affected their interpersonal skills and mental well-being negatively.

On the other hand, children who actively partcipate in organized group activities such as dance, music or sports classes in their free time, not only possess higher levels of team-spirit, but also develop social and communication skills. This practice contributes to their overall cognitive development by developing their interpersonal skills. For instance, young kids participating in martial arts class on weekends, learn discipline, team-spirit and resilience in their life. Therefore, active participation in such group activities enhaces their physical and mental well-being.

In conclusion, although encouraging children to entertain themselves makes them self-dependent, I believe motivating them to participate in organised activities improves their physical and mental heath and also develops their social skills which will foster a cohesive society by encouraging interdependence in the future generation.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall7.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have addressed all parts of the prompt by discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. Your position is consistent throughout the essay. The ideas are relevant, such as the mention of interpersonal skills and cognitive development. However, the development of these ideas could be more thorough. For instance, while you mention that isolation affects mental health, you could explain the 'why' or 'how' in more detail to reach a higher band. The structure is logical, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes your arguments. Overall, you have fulfilled the requirements of the task well.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. You use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Therefore' to link your paragraphs and sentences effectively. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with each paragraph focusing on a central theme. The flow is generally smooth, although some transitions could be more sophisticated to avoid a slightly mechanical feel. Referencing is clear throughout the text, and the relationship between the ideas is easy to follow for the reader.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with some precision. Phrases like 'interpersonal skills', 'cognitive development', and 'resilience' are used appropriately. There are some minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'offsprings' (the plural of offspring is offspring), 'self-entertain themselves' (redundant), and 'heath' (spelling error). Despite these occasional slips, the vocabulary is adequate for the task and does not impede communication. To improve, try to incorporate more varied collocations and avoid redundant phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You show a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several error-free sentences, which is positive. However, there are some persistent grammatical errors, such as 'their on their digital devices' (repetition) and 'partcipate' (spelling). Additionally, some phrasing is slightly awkward, such as 'self-entertain themselves'. While these errors are noticeable, they do not significantly impede the reader's understanding. To reach a higher band, focus on refining your control over complex sentence structures and proofreading for minor slips in subject-verb agreement and spelling.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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