Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this essay I would strongly support the idea that parents should encourage their children to participate in the organized group activities in their spare time and would like to give my opinion for not supporting the idea of children to learn to occupy themselves on their own.

Children to take part in the organized group activities are likely to booth their confidence and enhance the ability to be the better person to participate in the social activities in their lives going forward as an adult. In my experience I have seen children who are more out going and have been participating the extra curricular activities are more confident and performing well in their academics as well as socially capable.

It is god to be on your own for children to spend the time by playing inside the house or doing some activities such as paining, playing with toys or any other constructive activity that help the children to be more focused in the work and individual tasks in future but the children will have to deal with the out side the world and to leave the comfort zone to step out and interact with the groups and participate in the group activities too that will develop the public skills like communication, problem solving, forming opinions and be the better grown up.

For example, various studies shows that the children who participate more in the outdoor games, interact more with the children of same age are found to be more confident child and have strong skills to solve the problem, be the part of the communication, helpful to the peer, physically healthy as well. However; on the other side the children are not seemed to be more productive, confident and successful in the future life who liked to spend their time on their own but can be focused in some of the life skills but not as the children who are more interacting with the kids.

Children who participates in the group activities are better input in the out world as compare to the once who are on themselves occupied.

In my opinion, I stand with the idea that parents should encourage their kids to spend the extra time in the organized group activities to sharpen soft and hard skills of the children instead of the parents to emphasize more on learning by their own.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed both sides of the argument and provided a clear personal opinion. However, the development of your ideas is somewhat repetitive. For instance, you mention 'confidence' and 'social skills' in almost every paragraph, which limits the depth of your analysis. While you provide a clear position, the arguments regarding the benefits of solitary play are somewhat dismissed rather than explored in a balanced way. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph introduces a distinct, well-supported point rather than restating the same benefits of group activities throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'For example', 'However', and 'In my opinion' to link your thoughts. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as the transition 'However; on the other side'. Additionally, some sentences are quite long and convoluted, which occasionally makes the flow of ideas feel disjointed. Improving the variety of your linking words and ensuring that each sentence connects smoothly to the next will help improve your score in this area.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'good', 'better', and 'things', and there are several word-choice errors, such as 'booth their confidence' (instead of 'boost') and 'out world' (instead of 'outside world'). There are also some spelling errors like 'paining' (painting) and 'once' (ones). To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and topic-specific vocabulary related to child development and social interaction, and pay closer attention to word forms and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'children who participates') and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'the children are not seemed to be more productive'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of semicolons and commas. While your meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement would significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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