Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Today it is difficult for parents to decide for children whether playing in groups or by themselves during leisure time. Some parents encourage their children to take part in organised group activities, while others believe occupying themselves is beneficial for their children's development. This essay will discuss both views before a reasoned conclusion is drawn.
Focusing on the former view, the prime argument is that organised group activities help children to learn different skills such as how to communicate with others, teamwork and coordination. As children understand other people and improve their personality. For instance, children can make new friends with the hobbies and skills, also it helps them to make a strong bond with each other. Furthermore, group activities encourages children to play outdoor games and become fit and healthy.
However, proponents of the latter view have their own claims. To begin with, children can occupy themselves with various activities that assist them to develop important brain skills. For example, parents assign a couple of tasks including drawing, puzzles and fun activity games to their children to occupy themselves. As a result, they can become intelligent students or individuals and complete their task within time. Additionally, children can not only learn bad words but also bad behavior to play with others.
To conclude and offer my position, I support the former view rather than the latter view because organised group activities offer more benefits to improve children's future in various ways. Additionally, group activities help children to make new friends and a strong bond with each other.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both views and provides a clear position. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention benefits of group activities like 'teamwork' and 'coordination', the explanation remains superficial. Similarly, the argument for independent play is slightly underdeveloped, relying on general statements like 'develop important brain skills' without specific examples of how these skills are fostered. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is supported by a more detailed explanation or a concrete example that directly links back to the prompt's core question regarding child development.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs for each view, and a conclusion. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Focusing on the former view', 'Furthermore', and 'To begin with' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and some cohesive links are slightly repetitive. For instance, the transition to the conclusion is clear, but the final paragraph repeats points already made in the first body paragraph rather than synthesizing the argument. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear thematic focus would enhance the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proponents', 'development', and 'coordination'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward phrasing, such as 'make a strong bond with each other' (better: 'foster strong interpersonal relationships') and 'learn bad words but also bad behavior' (better: 'be exposed to negative language or antisocial behavior'). The vocabulary is generally sufficient to convey meaning, but it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. Focusing on collocations and more academic synonyms will help elevate your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include 'Today it is difficult for parents to decide for children whether playing...' (missing a verb or preposition), 'group activities encourages' (subject-verb agreement error), and 'children can not only learn bad words but also bad behavior to play with others' (awkward structure). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and refining complex sentence constructions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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