Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It is becoming a debatable issue that a half proportion of parents believe that children should participate in group activities in their spare time while some parents believe that children should do what they want to enjoy. In this essay, I will discuss both the consequences along with my opinion.
As every parent want their children to achieve everything in their life. So, they think their children do not waste their extra time when they are off to school. Parents want their children to perform extra curriculum activities like group discussions or any sports in teams, so they can get more knowledge from their surroundings and stay fit and healthy after participating in physical activities.
On the other hand, some parents believe and do not want to pressurize their children in any way. So, they encourage their children to do whatever you want which makes you happy. They always support their children in case of any sports, studies, or doing nothing. ig. It is believed by many experts that children who pursue their hobbies or other things like study, playing games or spend time with themselves are considered healthier and mentally strong.
In my opinion, parents who support their children to enjoy their life and making decision own their own are more successful and happy in their life. Because they can achieve anything with pressure, but they cannot enjoy this process.
To conclude this, whether parents always want their children to achieve their goals and become successful however they should not impose their decisions on their children, children should be supported as much as they can so they can choose their aim and enjoy every single movement of their life.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument for group activities is limited to 'knowledge' and 'fitness' without exploring the social or psychological benefits in depth. Similarly, the counter-argument regarding independent play is brief and lacks concrete examples. The conclusion is a bit repetitive and does not fully synthesize the points discussed. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand your supporting points with more detailed explanations or specific real-world examples, ensuring that each paragraph contributes significantly to the overall argument.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as the transition 'ig.' (which appears to be a typo for 'e.g.') and the repetitive use of 'So' to start sentences. The flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'conversely'). While the overall progression is clear, the internal cohesion within paragraphs is occasionally disrupted by grammatical inaccuracies, making the logical links feel less sophisticated.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing, such as 'do what they want to enjoy' or 'achieve everything in their life'. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'a half proportion of parents' and 'extra curriculum activities' (which should be 'extracurricular'). To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and precise terminology related to child development and education. Avoid informal abbreviations like 'ig.' and ensure that your word choices are consistently formal.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'As every parent want their children' (subject-verb agreement error) and 'they cannot enjoy this process' (the logic here is unclear). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with sentence fragments like 'So, they think...'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of errors in basic grammar—such as verb forms and sentence construction—prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and main verb.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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