Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is believed by many that parents must encourage their children to engage in group activities while they are free. Others argue by stating that youngsters should know how to keep themselves busy. This essay will discuss both these views before prevention my own opinion.

On the one hand, people who agrees with the former view supports this argument because during play time with the fellow peers , children develop valuable skills such as confidence, leadership skills, teamwork and many more. For instance, minors who often participate in group activities do not hesitate in expressing themselves in front of others, unlike children who keeps themselves isolated. Moreover, participating in groups not only make them socially active but also gives them opportunities to enhance their knowledge and skills which will benefit them in the long run.

On the other hand, leaving children alone to spend time according to their preferences helps them learn about their interests. Being occupied by themselves children learn about independent decision making and problem solving skills. Consequently, young people who learned to stay alone can regulate their emotions in a better way compared to ones who spent most of their times with others.

In conclusion, undoubtedly organized activities do serve youngsters with a lot of benefits, however excessive extra curricular pressure on children do not support them in better cognitive growth. Whereas, alone time gives children a better understanding of personal interests.

In my perspective, parents should adopt a balanced approach while raising their children. This is due to the fact that both group activities and alone time is necessary for one's personal growth in learning skills like teamwork, cooperation, problem solving and time management.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant and generally well-developed, though some points could benefit from more specific examples. For instance, the discussion on 'cognitive growth' in the conclusion is a bit vague and introduces a new concept not fully explored in the body paragraphs. The position is consistent throughout, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes the arguments while clearly stating the author's stance. To reach a higher band, ensure that all arguments introduced in the conclusion are fully supported within the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two viewpoints and the conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'Consequently' are used effectively to guide the reader. However, there are minor issues with referencing and flow; for example, the phrase 'prevention my own opinion' in the introduction is awkward and slightly disrupts the logical flow. Overall, the structure is clear, and the relationship between ideas is easy to follow throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing for clear communication. There is an attempt to use a range of vocabulary, such as 'cognitive growth', 'regulate their emotions', and 'balanced approach'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'prevention my own opinion' (instead of 'presenting') and 'excessive extra curricular pressure... do not support them' (where 'hinder' or 'impede' would be more precise). While these errors do not impede communication, they limit the range and precision of the lexical resource.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues: 'people who agrees' (should be 'agree'), 'children who keeps' (should be 'keep'), and 'both group activities and alone time is' (should be 'are'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation and phrasing errors, such as the space before the comma in 'fellow peers ,'. These errors are frequent enough to prevent a higher score, although they do not significantly impede the reader's understanding.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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