Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Some school of thoughts, believe parents should motivate their children to participate in organized group activities during their leisure time. Other persons believe, it is mandatory for children to practise how to keep themselves busy on their own. This essay will discuss both views and also give the writer's opinion at the end.

On the one hand,participating in organized group activities is beneficial for learning routines and diversities. An organized activity, is structured and follows a well sort out plan and time. Children who belong to organized group activities need to allocate a certain time on a specific day for that group event. This allows children to develop routines which are well-structured and refined. The ability to stick to a certain routine helps these children to be organized adults in the future. Organized group activities, often involve children from different cultures, with different upbringing and contrasting personalities. Participating in these group events, teaches children about diversity. It teaches them to be more accomodating to the differences we have as humans. It also allows them pick up good traits by observing the other members of the group. For instance, being part of an organized study group, allows children to learn new ways of studying and solving questions from their teammates.

On the other hand, it is important to allow children learn how to keep busy themselves. This allows them to be more creative and discover their interests. Children who are often left to occupy themselves, often think of creative ways to do so. They have to task their brain on things to do and the type of games to play. They often at times have to use their imaginations to create objects. This helps in the development of their brain cells. Furthermore, it also gives them the ability to discover their interests. Children who are often left to occupy themselves, try on multiple things until they find what they are good at. Once they begin to have interest in a certain area, they will want to build on it. This allows for self-discovery. For instance, children who likes to draw pretty dresses will see themselves leaning towards fashion designing in the future.

In conclusion,it is important for parents to motivate their children to take part in organized group activities as it allows them to learn routines and welcome diversities. In my opinion, I believe it is more important for children to learn ways to occupy themselves. This allows them to be creative and discover their interest.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response effectively addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both views—the benefits of organized group activities and the importance of children learning to occupy themselves independently—while also presenting a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. Ideas are extended and supported with relevant explanations and examples, such as mentioning study groups and fashion designing. However, there are some minor generalizations, and the conclusion slightly shifts or refines the stance by declaring independence as more important. Overall, the task is well-handled, meeting the requirements of Band 7.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay is clearly organized with a logical progression from introduction to body paragraphs and a concluding summary. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas, with one paragraph dedicated to group activities and another to independent play. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion' are utilized to guide the reader through the arguments. While referencing and linking are generally clear, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive in structure. This positions the response comfortably in Band 7.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate and sufficient range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'diversities', 'accommodating', 'self-discovery', and 'fashion designing'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation inaccuracies throughout the text, such as 'Some school of thoughts, believe' instead of 'Some schools of thought believe', 'well sort out plan' instead of 'well-thought-out plan', and 'children who likes' instead of 'children who like'. These minor lexical slips and awkward collocations prevent the score from reaching a higher band, placing it at Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating the ability to construct multi-clause sentences like 'Children who belong to organized group activities need to allocate a certain time on a specific day for that group event.' However, grammatical errors occur with some frequency, particularly regarding punctuation (e.g., missing spaces after commas such as 'conclusion,it'), subject-verb agreement ('children who likes'), and comma splices or unnecessary commas ('Other persons believe, it is mandatory'). While these errors do not impede overall communication, they prevent the essay from achieving a Band 7.

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