Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays children do not socialize themselves very much as they prefer to spend their time on mobile phones. Parents are therefore sought to encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time.This will enable them to discover children of other cultures and age group.

Children who take part in these group activities will be representative of tomorrow's society. They will know how to consolidate this human approach and earn and give respects to others. Consider them attending a function

However, in todays time with the burden of school and tuitions, they do not know how to be self dependent. They depend heavily on their parents for example not knowing how to iron their uniform or making their bed. Having some free time are also considered as crucial for their self development.

In my opinion, self development and familiarisation with others are equally important. Children do not have time to learn all these basics at home or at school. Consequently, children should be guided to these principles of life for their own benefit.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the task only partially, and importantly, it fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 250 words, coming in at 177 words. While the writer touches upon both views regarding organised group activities and independent self-occupation, the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the discussion on children learning independence mentions ironing uniforms or making beds, but these points are abruptly introduced without full exploration or a well-sustained argument. The writer's position is presented in the conclusion, but the overall development lacks the depth and extension expected for higher bands. To improve, the writer needs to expand significantly on each viewpoint, provide more thorough examples, and ensure the full word count is achieved.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The text displays some organisation with visible paragraphing, but there is no clear overall progression throughout the essay. Cohesive devices are sometimes inadequate or repetitive, leading to choppy transitions. For example, sentences like 'Consider them attending a function' are incomplete and disrupt the logical flow between ideas. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as the pronoun shift when moving between topics. To reach a higher band, the writer should use a wider variety of cohesive devices more accurately, ensure every paragraph has a clear topic sentence with fully developed supporting points, and maintain a smoother, more logical progression from introduction to conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey basic meaning. The writer attempts some less common phrases, such as 'consolidate this human approach' and 'self development,' but these contain noticeable errors in collocation and word choice that cause some difficulty for the reader. Additionally, expressions like 'todays time' and 'socialize themselves' reflect unnatural phrasing. Spelling is generally acceptable, but the overall lexical range restricts the precision of the argument. To improve, the writer needs to incorporate more natural collocations, precise academic vocabulary, and idiomatic expressions related to the topic of child upbringing and socialisation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple and moderately complex forms. There are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that can cause difficulty for the reader. Examples include 'Parents are therefore sought to encourage,' incorrect preposition use, and subject-verb agreement issues such as 'Having some free time are also considered.' Attempts at complex sentences often result in faulty structures and awkward phrasing. To achieve a higher score, the writer must expand their grammatical repertoire, ensure accurate use of verb forms, voices, and subject-verb agreement, and carefully proofread to eliminate frequent structural errors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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