Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Numerous people think that parents should be force thier kids to participate in organizied group acivities in the lesiure time to leran about distinct things such as how to work in a group ,togain confidence. However, children should enrol thier by themselve, is beileverd by others. I will discuss both views in forthcoming paragraphs with valid examples.

To initiate with, parents should encourage thier children to get enrol in group activites because they have bettter knowledge about gruop work because they think tht due to this, they will learn about problem solving skill, they can gain hier confidence, enhance thier public speaking.Owingto this , if their parents force them for grop participation, they will think that its our responsiblitities to listn to thier parents and when they know them they do not have any way to decline it. Hence, they will take part in group activity and will teach alot. Furhtermore, sometime children preoritize to other things instead of group work. therefore they facse many challenging in future such as to make new friends and they may become more introvert as well so to avoid this facts parents should encourage them to take part in groups.

On the other hand, children have to get an enrolment by own in groups. Because, sometime parents do no have idea what kind of group they will enrol, and do not know about their classmates and so on, so in these situations childrena have better knowledge about it. Due to this they should take their own disicion about what kind of gruops they are going to take part in. Moreover, they become independent while they take their disicion own. For instance, children learn to do things without the envolment of thier parents. Also, they can improve thier creativity while participating in group by thier own.Because, they will think about it so much alone of what to do in group, what they need, how can do it better about such things. Hence, they can enhace thier creativity.

According to my perspective, children are able to take the choices by themselve.So they can become independent, gain knowledge, meet new people and can increase more skill. Apart from this , it is a also good way to keep children from bad habbit . because they will keep themsemselve busy with thier work to do reaserch.

In conclusion, i believe that both viwe have thier own benefits. Although, encourage by parents to take part in group will give time to spend with them but making choices by thier pwn can be be more fruitfil because they can enjot their own time and they can gain alot of information.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both views—that parents should encourage organised group activities and that children should learn to occupy themselves—and provides a clear position in the conclusion. However, some ideas are under-developed or repetitive. For instance, the arguments regarding social skills and confidence are introduced in the introduction and repeated in the body paragraphs without sufficient extension or concrete examples. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to fully develop each main point with deeper explanation and more precise supporting details.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph-by-paragraph structure that addresses the introduction, body views, and a concluding opinion. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the abrupt transitions between sentences in the second body paragraph. Cohesive devices like 'To initiate with', 'Furhtermore', and 'On the other hand' are used, but referencing pronouns like 'them' and 'they' create occasional ambiguity regarding who is being referred to. Improving the logical flow between sentences and refining cohesive links will enhance the overall progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The writer displays a limited and minimally adequate vocabulary range suitable for basic communication, but noticeable errors are present that cause some difficulty for the reader. There are frequent spelling mistakes, such as 'thier' instead of 'their', 'organizied' instead of 'organised', and 'acivities' instead of 'activities'. Furthermore, word choices and word formations are occasionally inappropriate, such as 'get enrol' instead of 'enroll' and 'fruitfil' instead of 'fruitful'. To improve, the student must expand their lexical repertoire and pay closer attention to spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response uses a limited range of structures, featuring a mix of simple and complex sentences, but attempts at complex structures are often faulty. There are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'parents should be force thier kids', missing articles, and incorrect prepositions inside grammatical patterns. Punctuation errors are also noticeable throughout the text. While the meaning can generally be discerned despite these errors, the high frequency of grammatical inaccuracies restricts the score and requires greater control over basic and complex sentence patterns.

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