Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Individuals argue that parents should encourage their children to participate in organised group activities in their free time. While others argue that children should learn to occupy themselves on their own. This eassy will discuss both the sides and I will provide my opinion at the end.

They are certain parents who values sport activties and its benefits in a long term. They are more likely to enroll their children in sports activities in the early age. Soccer is one of the most popular sports among children. Therefore, children that are enrolled into the soccer training lessons improves coordination while working in a team and the analytical approach of mind to proactively looking for a solution in real time challenges. As a result, these skills helps children to succed in both areas like academically and sports, also successfully utilise their free time.

Parents are having hectic and busy lifestyle in this modern world. They are trying to make balance between professional and personal life, however most of them are failed to do it. Therefore, they allowed their children to occupy themselves with different sets of toys, video games and computer. They can learn computer related skills and improves problem solving upto certain extend. Nowadays, most of the teenager are addicated with social media. As a result, it differectly affects their behaviour, phone's screen-time and lack of social engagement.

At the end, there are parents who wants their children to engage in sports in free time to develope various skills. On the other side, parents with extreme busy schedule hardly manage to plan such things for their children and prefers them to occupy with electronic devices and toys. I believe that taking part in organised activities are immensly beneficial for childrens.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both views on children's free-time activities and providing a personal opinion, earning a solid foundation at this level. However, some ideas remain limited and under-developed, which keeps the response at this band. For instance, the discussion around children occupying themselves with toys and video games mentions potential computer-related skills and problem-solving, but this point is quickly cut short and transitions into the negative impacts of social media. Furthermore, the final paragraph mentions that busy parents prefer electronic devices, yet it lacks detailed extension or concrete examples from the writer's own knowledge. The position is discernible in the introduction and conclusion, but the overall development of arguments lacks the depth required for a higher level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates some organization with a clear four-paragraph structure and an introduction that outlines the plan of the essay. However, there is a lack of clear overall progression between the ideas, particularly in the body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate or repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'They are' or 'As a result' to start sentences, which creates a mechanical feel rather than smooth logical flow. Referencing can also be unclear, as seen in phrases like 'They are certain parents' instead of 'There are certain parents.' Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal logical links between sentences need to be managed more skilfully to guide the reader effortlessly through the arguments.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The writer uses a limited but minimally adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully communicating everyday concepts related to parenting and activities. However, noticeable word-choice, collocation, and word-form errors occur throughout the text, which causes some difficulty for the reader. Examples include spelling and morphological mistakes such as 'eassy' instead of 'essay', 'at the early age' instead of 'at an early age', 'addicated' instead of 'addicted', and 'differectly' instead of 'differently'. Less common lexical items are attempted, such as 'proactively looking for a solution' and 'social engagement', but inaccuracies in style and form prevent the vocabulary from achieving the precision needed for a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response displays a limited range of grammatical structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside a few faulty attempts at complex forms. Frequent errors are present across various structures, including subject-verb agreement and article usage, which can cause difficulty for the reader. Notable errors include 'this eassy will discuss both the sides' (article misuse), 'children that are enrolled into the soccer training lessons improves' (subject-verb agreement error), 'this skills helps children' (plurality agreement error), and 'taking part in organised activities are immensly beneficial' (plurality agreement error). Punctuation and sentence boundaries also show recurring flaws, such as sentence fragments or incorrect comma splices.

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