Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Although a considerable proprotion of people firmly believe that parents should support their children to join organised group activities in their leisure time due to its potential benefits, others strongly argue that they should choose activities own their own. From my perspective, I am more inclined to support the latter view, primarily because it enhances children's decision making abilities.

To begin with, spending time in group activities prepare individuals to develop friendships with others, and how to coorporate with team members. When children parcipate in group sports they make friends and become more social. Moreover, working for a single goal requires a better understanding and cooperation with others. The more they play in teams, the more they are likely to develop these skills. For instance, in a basket ball game all players a have better understanding of their teammates strategies because they had been parctice together. It is thus understandable why many think that parent should encourage their children to take part in group work.

On the other hand, choosing actvities on their own allow children to make their decisions independently. This will help them reduce reliance on others and focus on their own likes and goals. In addition to this, self-reliance makes people more emotionally strong because when they encounter any issues while playing alone, they tend to face alone. Subsequently, they are likey to become more independent. For example, a cyclist can become an effective player and handle challenges by their own becasue of his practice in alone.

In conclusion, while palying in group has some advantages, I firmly believe that parents should leave their children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. This is because of its benefits, like self dependent and emotionally capable.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state a clear preference for children occupying themselves independently, giving relevant reasons such as decision-making and self-reliance. The group-activity paragraph also explains social benefits and includes a basketball example. However, the two sides are not developed equally: the benefits of group activities are explained more clearly, while the example of a cyclist is difficult to follow and does not clearly show how independent activity builds emotional strength. Your conclusion repeats your position but could draw together the comparison more precisely. To strengthen the response, explain each main reason in more depth and use examples that directly demonstrate the point being made.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Transitions such as “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow. Some connections between ideas are less clear, however. In the group paragraph, the move from making friends to understanding teammates’ strategies is abrupt, and the basketball example is difficult to interpret. The final sentence also lists benefits without clearly linking them back to the argument. Use referencing and linking phrases more precisely, and make each example follow directly from the claim it supports, so cohesion feels less formulaic.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “decision making abilities,” “cooperation,” “self-reliance,” and “independently.” However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, such as “proprotion,” “coorporate,” “parcipate,” and “actvities.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear: “choose activities own their own,” “face alone,” and “self dependent” do not express the intended meaning accurately. Aim to learn common collocations as complete phrases—for example, “take part in team sports” and “become emotionally resilient”—and proofread spelling and word forms. More precise vocabulary would make your ideas easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including “Although…” in the opening and “because…” clauses to explain reasons. The main ideas are generally understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in verb agreement, sentence construction, and articles. For example, “spending time in group activities prepare” should use a singular verb, and “choosing activities on their own allow” has the same agreement problem. In “all players a have better understanding,” the article and sentence structure are faulty; “they tend to face alone” also needs a clear object or a different construction. Work on subject–verb agreement and check each sentence for complete, natural grammatical patterns. Greater accuracy in these areas would make your complex sentences more controlled.

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