Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The physical and mental growth of children is very necessary. Many guardians encouraged their childens to take part in social events whenever they have time and most of the parents give them their alone time. This essay reflects the parents thoughts towards their childen growth.

On the one hand, attends the social events and group activities by youngsters is very essential for their mental and physical health. With the help of these events, a child easily improve their social and communication skills. For example, group activities bring confidence in a child and he will not hezitate to put his own thought in front of everyone.

On the other hand, many parents try to give their child to their own space in which they can understand their own goals and achievements. On their own time, children gives proper time to their study. By this time, they will known better themselves and also find their creativity. Futhermore, children becomes independent. They do not depend other minds and solution. They knows, what they want to become in life and what is good for them or not. They are able to takes decision of their own life without and circumstances.

In conclusion, most of the guardians encouaged their childen to take part in social activities and group events and this is very important for their growth. By these of activities, children boots up their confidence and able to improve their their communication and social skills. But many parents give their children to their own time in which they can understand their creativity and find their goals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses both views: group activities are linked to confidence and communication, while independent time is associated with study, creativity and decision-making. However, the discussion remains limited and several claims are asserted rather than explained. For instance, the point that children “will not hesitate to put his own thought” in front of others could be developed with a specific example of how teamwork builds confidence. The position is also not consistently clear: the introduction says parents provide both kinds of time, and the conclusion repeats both sides without clearly stating which approach you support or how you balance them. State your opinion directly and support each main idea with a fuller explanation or relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. The signposts “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers identify the sections. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and the conclusion largely repeats earlier points rather than bringing them together around a definite opinion. Some links are mechanical or imprecise, such as “By this time” and “By these of activities,” which do not clearly show the relationship between ideas. Improve cohesion by using clearer references and transitions, and organise each body paragraph around one main claim followed by explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “social and communication skills,” “group activities,” “creativity,” and “independent.” These choices make the general subject understandable. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make expression awkward, such as “give their child to their own space,” “boots up their confidence,” “hezitate,” and “encouaged.” Repetition of “children,” “activities,” and “own time” also limits flexibility. Aim to learn natural word partnerships and check spelling carefully; for example, describe parents as “allowing children time to themselves” and say activities “boost confidence.” More precise vocabulary would help communicate the ideas clearly without changing their meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, errors are frequent, including subject–verb agreement (“a child easily improve,” “children gives,” “children becomes”), verb forms (“They are able to takes”), and tense consistency (“Many guardians encouraged” followed by “whenever they have time”). Sentence construction is also faulty in places, as in “attends the social events and group activities by youngsters is very essential,” and the final sentence of the third paragraph is difficult to interpret. Use a reliable subject–verb pattern, check verb forms after modal verbs, and build longer sentences around a clear main clause. Punctuation around clauses and lists also needs more consistent control.

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