Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There has been a argument going around weather childern should be encouraged to participate in group activities or learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

First group of people belives that children are curious beings who learns by asking questions and watching others for which social gatherings are important such as sports or any such group activities in their free time. In addition, they also belives that its important to be able to present themselves in front of world otherwise they might miss out on opportunities in career.

On the other hand, People belives that it is not necessary to keep an eye on child and be aware of whoever he/she is interracting with. Their children might be in bad influence due to stangers of those activities. On the top of which they belive that for the most amount of the time children are alone and if they don't know how to occupy themselves, It will adversly affect their mental condition possibly be a reson for depression in future.

I personally belive that both parties have stong view point but it is more important for a children to be socially active and being able to present hiimself/herself. If they are able to share their feelings and able to mix in groups it will not only help them learn better but also reduce chances of being alone and getting depressed. Individual learns to stay alone on their own but it's difficult to socialize after certain age if they were not doing it from childhood.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and give a clear preference for organised social activity, explaining that it can help children learn, share feelings and avoid isolation. However, the discussion is brief and several claims are not fully explained: for example, the link between group activities and future career opportunities is asserted rather than illustrated, while the concern about strangers is not developed. The response contains 246 words, so it is four words below the 250-word minimum; the eight words copied from the prompt are not counted. This shortfall contributes to the limited development. To strengthen the response, explain each side with a specific example and make your own position more fully supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a concluding opinion. Transitions such as “On the other hand” and “I personally believe” help signal the direction of the argument. However, progression within the body paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and ideas are joined mechanically with “In addition” and “On the top of which.” The second viewpoint also shifts from parental supervision to children occupying themselves alone without clearly explaining the connection. Some references, such as “those activities,” are not precise. Use clearer topic sentences and develop one point at a time, with linking phrases that show the actual relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “group activities,” “socially active,” “opportunities,” and “mental condition.” However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, sometimes making the reader pause: “weather” for “whether,” “childern,” “stangers,” and “adversly.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “a argument going around,” “bad influence due to strangers,” and “for the most amount of the time.” Aim to learn accurate collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise expressions would help you explain the benefits and risks without relying on broad or awkward wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if they don't know how to occupy themselves” and a reason clause beginning “because.” However, errors are frequent, and some complex sentences are difficult to follow. Examples include “children … learns,” where the verb does not agree with its subject, and “First group of people believes,” which needs an article and consistent agreement. There are also problems with articles, plurals and sentence boundaries, as in “a children” and the capitalised “It” after a comma. Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea, then check subject–verb agreement, articles and punctuation before adding more complex clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.