Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 7.0)

In modern society, there is ongoing debate about how children should spend their leisure time. While some people believe that parents ought to encourage their children to join organized group activities, others argue that it is crucial for young people to learn how to entertain themselves independently. In my opinion, both approaches offer valuable benefits, but a balance between them is necessary.

On the one hand, participating in organized group activities provides several clear advantages for children. Firstly, group activities such as sports team, drama clubs or youth organizations helps children develop social skills . By interacting with peers, they learn how to cooperate, communicate effectively and resolve conflicts. Secondly, organized activities are usually supervised by adults which ensures safe envirenment. For example, children who play in a football team learn discipline, teamwork and how to follow instructions from a coach which can be useful for their future academic and proffesional life.

On the other hand, allowing children to occupy themselves on their own is equally important for their development. When children spend time independently, they are focused to use their imagination to create their own games and pursue individual hobbies such as reading, drawingor playing a musical instrument. This fosters creativity and independence. Furthermore, children who learn to entertain themselves are less likely to depend on external things or screen time to avoid boredom, which helps them become more self-sufficient individuals in adulthood.

In conclusion, both organized group activities and independently free time play vital role in a child development. While group activities teach social skills and teamwork, personal time develops creativity and independence. Therefore, I believe parents should aim for a balanced approach, encouraging children to participate in group events while also giving enough free time to manage on their own.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.5

The response addresses both views and gives a clear, consistent opinion: the opening and conclusion both support a balance between organised activities and independent time. Relevant reasons are provided, including cooperation, discipline, creativity and self-sufficiency, with examples such as football teams and individual hobbies. This meets the task well, and the ideas are generally extended rather than merely listed. To strengthen the response further, develop one or two points with more specific explanation—for instance, explain how a child’s independent hobby builds decision-making or persistence, rather than moving quickly from creativity to adulthood. The discussion is persuasive and focused, though some claims, such as supervised activities ensuring safety, would benefit from qualification or a more precise example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.5

The essay has a clear four-paragraph structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for each view, and a conclusion that restates the position. Progression is easy to follow, and signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” makes the discussion’s stages explicit. Within paragraphs, ideas are generally ordered logically: the group-activity paragraph moves from social skills to supervision and discipline, while the independent-time paragraph explains creativity and self-sufficiency. To make cohesion more polished, rely slightly less on formulaic transitions and connect some supporting sentences through clearer reference or cause-and-effect links. Overall, organisation is strong and the reader can follow the argument throughout.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

The response uses a suitable range of topic vocabulary, including “social skills,” “resolve conflicts,” “supervised,” “self-sufficient,” and “independence.” These choices communicate the main ideas clearly, and phrases such as “a balanced approach” are appropriate to the argument. However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, which limits precision: “focused to use their imagination” is not natural, and “depend on external things” is vague. There are also spelling and spacing slips, including “envirenment,” “proffesional,” and “drawingor.” To improve, check spelling carefully and choose more exact collocations, such as “encouraged to use their imagination” and “rely on external entertainment.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 7.0

There is a good range of sentence forms, including complex clauses with “While,” “When,” and “which,” and many sentences are accurate and easy to understand. For example, “By interacting with peers, they learn how to cooperate…” is well controlled, as is the contrast in the conclusion. A few grammatical errors remain. In “sports team, drama clubs or youth organizations helps,” the plural subject requires “help”; “play in a football team” should be “play on a football team”; and “play vital role in a child development” needs articles and plural agreement, such as “play a vital role in a child’s development.” There are also punctuation-spacing slips. More careful checking of agreement, articles and possessives would improve accuracy while preserving the current structural variety.

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