Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

A number of people believe that parents have to promote their child for participation in group tasks during their leisure time. However, others argue that children need to leran about how to spend their free time on their own. I agree with the both statements, as taking part in organised activites will be responsible for their overall growth and development of good habits, whereas making ownself busy will improve their focus and provide them chance for their eveluation and correction of their mistakes.

On the one hand, encouraing children to take part in organised group activities play a pivotal role for development of essential skills and better for their physical fitness. For instance, playing sports like football teach them good communication, cooperation, teamwork, improve their critical-thinking and problem-solving skills. Additionally, it will helps them to maintain their physical fitness by playing sports, enhace their lung-capacity and better for their refreshment after long study hours. Sometimes they can turn their sports passion into career and they will have successful future in their favourite sports game.

On the other hand, occupying themselves on their own has it's own advantages and children should know about it. Such as, doing painting during free time alone will help them to improve their concentration power, better opportunity for development of innovative ideas and it can reduce the chances of outer disturbances. As a result, they become smart, creative, become more patience person, talented in painting and sometime find their mistakes. Therefore, self-time is also important for children during their growing age for their better overall development.

In conclusion, a balanced approach would be preferable as compare to reliant on any particular view point, because organised group activies assit them to inculate good morals, better habits and makes them social people, whereas self-time improves their focus, concentration and quality time to sharpen their particular skill. Therefore, both activites are responsible for their growth and well-being.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address both views and give a clear position: your conclusion supports a balance between organised activities and time alone. The two body paragraphs are relevant and include examples, such as football developing teamwork and painting encouraging concentration. You also explain several benefits rather than merely listing the two options, which makes the response well supported overall. To strengthen the discussion further, develop the reasoning behind a few broad claims—for example, explain how a child might turn a sporting interest into a career, or how independent time helps children recognise and correct mistakes. This would make the support more precise and less generalised.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion that brings them together. The progression is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers navigate the argument. Ideas within each paragraph generally follow a sensible sequence from claim to example and result. Some linking is less smooth where several benefits are added in a list, particularly in the paragraph about painting, and “Such as” begins a sentence without a clear grammatical connection to the preceding one. Use a wider range of natural transitions and connect examples more explicitly to the point they support.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “teamwork,” “critical-thinking,” “concentration,” and “physical fitness,” and the reader can understand the main ideas. However, the range and control are limited by repeated or unnatural expressions, such as “better for their overall development,” “occupying themselves on their own,” and “makes them social people.” There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “leran,” “activites,” “encouraing,” and “evaluation” where “development” appears intended. These reduce precision and make some phrases sound awkward. Aim to learn common collocations for this topic and check spelling and word forms carefully; more natural phrasing would make your ideas clearer and more fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “whereas,” “as,” and “because,” and the overall meaning is usually understandable. However, errors occur frequently in sentence construction and agreement. For example, “playing sports like football teach them” should use a singular verb, while “it will helps” combines incompatible verb forms. The sentence beginning “Such as” is a fragment, and “children become smart, creative, become more patience person” has faulty parallel structure and article use. There are also errors with possessives and punctuation, as in “it's own advantages.” Practise building accurate sentences around one main idea, then check subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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