Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Many people believe that guardians need to motivate their kids to participate in clubs or other group activities whereas others think that kids should learn it by themselves in order to keep themselves busy. In this essay, I will discuss the both ideoligies followed by my say in this in the end.

To begin with, people who think that kids need help and motivation to take part in groups are under an immense pressure of being good parents while working full time. Their fear and guilt of leaving child alone every evening after school force them to encourage their kids to go out for activities. For example, many new generation parents prefer to put their kids in various classes like dance, swimming and karate after school so that their kids will become productive in their freetime while they are absent. They ignore the fact that this practice can be a double eged sword because children feel heavy pressure to perform well even though they do not like the activity. However, sometimes kids find their passion because of this and will perform well in their life.

In contrast, some people crtisice this concept heavily because it ruins the essence of childhood. They believe kids should not live like an adult being productive all the time. Children to rest and play instead of being forced to take part in organised group activities. They think that parents should give more freedom and time so that their kids can develop their interest in things that they truly like to keep themselves busy. For instance, many schools in south-asia have the facility where child can select which sport they want to play or which language subject they want to learn.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that child must decide activities to spend free time and not the parent. Parents should motivate kids to try new things but they should not force their choices or dreams in the name of encouragement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both views and make your own position clear: organised activities can help children discover interests, but parents should encourage rather than impose choices. The examples of after-school classes and school options in South Asia are relevant, and the “double-edged sword” point recognises a drawback as well as a benefit. This meets the task well, though the two perspectives are not developed equally. The first paragraph focuses substantially on parents’ pressure and guilt, rather than explaining directly how group activities benefit children, while the second gives a clearer account of independence and freedom. To strengthen the response, explain more fully what children gain from each approach and connect each example explicitly to that benefit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion that states your opinion. Signposts such as “To begin with,” “In contrast,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow. Some links between ideas, however, are mechanical or unclear. For example, the first body paragraph moves from parents’ work pressures to children’s performance and then to discovering a passion without fully explaining the connections. The sentence “Children to rest and play” also interrupts the flow because its relationship to the preceding point is not clear. Use more precise referencing and add brief explanations between claims so that each paragraph develops as a connected argument, rather than relying mainly on transition phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range for the topic, including phrases such as “organised group activities,” “double-edged sword,” “develop their interest,” and “force their choices.” These help communicate the main ideas, and some less common expressions show an attempt to vary your vocabulary. However, several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors reduce precision: “the both ideoligies,” “crtisice,” “new generation parents,” and “in their freetime” are not natural or correctly formed. “Productive” is also repeated and may not accurately describe children’s leisure. Aim for more natural topic-specific phrasing and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary for benefits and drawbacks would help you express the argument with greater flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex forms, including a contrast clause with “whereas,” a reason clause beginning “because,” and a conditional structure in “even though they do not like the activity.” Most of the meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors occur. For example, “Children to rest and play” is missing a finite verb, and “where child can select” needs an article and plural agreement. In “Parents should motivate kids to try new things but they should not force their choices,” the pronoun reference is unclear: it could refer to parents or children. Review sentence completeness, articles, and agreement, and make pronouns unambiguous. Greater control of these patterns would make your varied sentence structures more consistently accurate.

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