Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some individuals argue thatn parents should motivate their kids participate in organised social activities in their less busy hour, while some argue that it is important for children to learn engage themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There are many reasons many parents will encourage their children to take part in social activities is. Firstly, allowing children to associet with their fellow mates is because it helps in developing social communication among themselves, Secondly, when a child begins to participate in organised group activities it helps them develop sence of team work abilities.

In other hands there is another advantages in teaching your children to occupy themselves on their own. For example, children who learn to occupy themselves understand self control on time, Another reason is, it helps child to know what it means to set a personal goal and archieve it.

any child that was helped inn this part can never give up easily when people arround him disapoint him becauese surviving difficult time will never be hard for him or her.

Neverthless, in as much as i only mentioned the advantages of two there also some disadvantages in them.

A child who is yhrown in society without proper parental guidance can easily emulate bad thing that not according to the life style of their family.

In the other hand a child whom their parents never allow to associet with feloow childre always finds it difficult to fit in into the social life style,

In conclusion, parents must understand to balance every choicese they make for their children in other to not make very hard for their children when they grow.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views: group activities are linked to communication and teamwork, while independent time is connected to self-control and setting personal goals. You also give a position in the conclusion, recommending balance, and the examples about poor guidance and difficulty fitting in are relevant. However, the discussion remains general and several points are not explained enough to show how these benefits arise. The opening repeats the task rather than establishing your own view, and the conclusion does not clarify how parents should balance the two approaches. Develop each main idea with a specific explanation or example, and state your position clearly from the beginning. The response meets the stated length requirement; 21 words copied from the prompt were excluded from the count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, a paragraph on disadvantages, and a conclusion. This helps the reader identify the main sections. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the sentence beginning “There are many reasons many parents…” is grammatically tangled, and the shift from advantages to disadvantages with “Nevertheless” is abrupt. Some linking phrases are inaccurate or repetitive, including “In other hands” and “In the other hand,” while “Firstly” and “Secondly” do not always connect clearly to complete ideas. Use simpler topic sentences, organise each paragraph around one clear point, and choose accurate transitions such as “On the other hand” and “Furthermore.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “organised group activities,” “team work,” “self control,” and “personal goal.” These choices show an effort to discuss social and personal development. However, the range is limited and several word choices, collocations, and spellings make the meaning less clear or sound unnatural. Examples include “less busy hour,” “fellow mates,” “surviving difficult time,” and “fit in into the social life style.” Spelling errors such as “associet,” “archieve,” and “disapoint” are also noticeable. Build a bank of natural phrases for this topic and check spelling carefully; more precise vocabulary will help express your ideas without relying on awkward wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast between the two views and a conditional idea in “A child who is… can easily…”. However, complex sentences are often difficult to control, and frequent errors affect clarity. For example, “There are many reasons many parents will encourage… is” has an incomplete and confused structure, while “it helps child to know” is missing an article. There are also problems with verb patterns and agreement, as in “motivate their kids participate” and “a child whom their parents never allow.” Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, particularly in the long sentence beginning “any child.” Practise accurate clause construction, articles, and subject–verb agreement before adding more complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.