Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Over the years people's mindset is attracted more towards big shopping complexes rather than small local stores. I think this is a positive development, because shopping malls offer major discounts and and they have variety of brands for shopping.

The big shopping complexes offer great discounts and sales to attract the customers. These malls buy all the goods in major quantities, so they get a profitable margin on selling price as compared to local stores. Therefore, it is possible for shopping malls to conduct frequent sales and provide discounts to the customers. In addition, such malls have collaboration with various banks which offers credit card discounts. Due to such attractive offers people often prefer to shop from shapping malls. For example, In India, ivenus stores inside large shopping centers offer several store benefits and credit card discounts on shopping of an iphone.

The big shopping malls are collection of several different stores. Therefore, it gives choice to the customers to select their favourite brand and shop from it. However, if we go to a local store for shopping, the variety of brands is significatly less, so customers do not get opportunity of brand selection. In addition, several top brands prefer to open their shops in major shopping complexes to attract the intended crowd. For example, the major shoes brands like Sketchers and Nike have more number of stores located in shopping malls.

In conclusion, buying products from shopping centers over local stores is a positive development, because major shopping malls provide incredible offers and they provide choice to the customers for buying from various brands.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction to the conclusion: you consider the shift to malls positive. You support this view with two relevant reasons—discounts and a wider choice of brands—and include examples involving iVenus, Nike and Skechers. This addresses the task and gives the reader a clear rationale. However, the discussion is weighted toward shoppers’ benefits; the effects of local shops closing are not explored, and the examples are asserted rather than developed to show their wider significance. The point about malls’ purchasing power is relevant, but its link to customers’ savings could be explained more precisely. To strengthen the response, acknowledge a possible cost of closures and explain why the advantages still outweigh it, while extending one example in more detail.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, each body paragraph develops a separate reason, and the conclusion restates your position. Linking expressions such as “Therefore,” “In addition,” and “For example” help show relationships between ideas, and the progression from discounts to brand choice is easy to follow. Some connections are a little mechanical, however, and repeated references to “big shopping complexes” and “shopping malls” make the flow less flexible. The contrast beginning “However” is useful, but the comparison with local stores could be integrated more smoothly into the paragraph’s main point. Use a wider range of referencing and transitions, and make sure each example is followed by a sentence explaining how it supports your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic vocabulary to explain your position, including “discounts,” “credit card,” “variety of brands,” and “intended crowd.” Some phrases show an attempt to be precise, such as “profitable margin” and “collaboration with various banks,” but several choices are unnatural or imprecise: “mindset is attracted,” “major quantities,” and “more number of stores.” Spelling errors such as “shapping,” “significatly,” and “ivenus” also reduce accuracy. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points, but the repeated use of “shopping malls” and “brands” limits flexibility. Aim for natural collocations and check spelling; for example, describe malls as buying goods “in bulk” and say brands have “more outlets” there.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex forms, including cause-and-effect clauses (“so they get…”) and a conditional comparison (“if we go to a local store…”). Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, but some grammatical errors remain. In “they have variety of brands,” an article is needed before “variety”; “malls are collection” also needs an article. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “collaboration with various banks which offers” and “it gives choice,” while “the major shoes brands” has an incorrect plural construction. The opening sentence also has an awkward structure, and the duplicated “and” is a punctuation/editing slip. Review articles, agreement, and plural forms, then proofread for small errors while retaining your complex sentence patterns.

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