Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In this contemporary era, shopping become a indispensable part of our life. whether it shops from local market or branded mall. It is argue that small business have closed due to the popularity of super markets. People do their shopping from the large mall not from the local shops. in my opinion, it negative development.

Small business plays a vital role in local people, it is their whole life and run the family incomes. business life food outlet, plastic materials, house chores items, clothes and cleaning material. All this can be sold in small shops in our neighborhood. On the other hand this all items available in huge market also. From this shops people can buy things on reasonable price and it can be available anytime. Moreover, it strengthen the relation between shopkeeper and costomer. People can pay money after sometimes if it is closed bond with shopkeeper.

There are several reasons behind the shut down of local shops and popularity of enormous malls. Firstly, it become a part of high society, if people buy from malls it simply signifies their status. Secondly, supermarket gives variety of product in one roof, for instance, vegetables, clothes, cleaning materials, kids, adults and old people. It is widely proliferated so if anybody wants any brand prefarance they can find it instantly. such as, nikes, nirma, surf exel, cadbury, colgate, anything they wants to purchase. Due to all this reasons people travel small business to large shopping centre.

To recapitulate, popularity of supermarket like iskon, palladium malls small business closed because it gives more amenities than this local shops. People find it more reliable and go for it. but i think they should buy things from local shops as well. it will very helpful for their economy and their independant.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by identifying the closure of local shops as a negative development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention the importance of local shops for community relationships and the convenience of supermarkets, the arguments are not fully extended. For instance, the point about 'high society' and 'status' is an interesting observation but lacks sufficient explanation to support the argument effectively. To reach a higher band, ensure that each main idea is supported by a clear, logical explanation or a more detailed example that directly relates to the negative impact of this trend on the community or economy.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'To recapitulate' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between the benefits of local shops and the benefits of supermarkets feels abrupt. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence will help create a more logical progression of ideas throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'contemporary era', 'indispensable', and 'proliferated'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'closed bond' instead of 'close bond', 'travel small business' instead of 'travel to large shopping centres', and 'prefarance' (spelling error). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they do indicate a need for more precise vocabulary usage. Focusing on learning common collocations and checking spelling will help improve your lexical range and accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('shopping become', 'business plays'), missing articles ('in local people'), and punctuation errors. Some sentences are also fragmented or lack necessary prepositions, which occasionally makes the writing feel disjointed. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of these errors limits the score. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that articles are used correctly before nouns.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.