Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Shopping is a ongoing trend for public. However, customers would to buy things from big shopping malls rather then a small local shops which is closed to their home because of this the had to closed their businesses. I think it is a positive development for community. I would like to describe that in the ensuing paragraphs.

To begin with, people became more shopaholic than the past as well as shopping trend also change according to the time. In recent years people like to travel far and love to spend their vacant time in large malls because it has lot of benefits like they can save their time in shopping whatever they want to buy they can get it at one place so they do not need to go for different thing to different places. For example, they want to buy a clothes and shoes then in local shops they have to rom around here and there whereas in mall they can find it next door which save time.

Moreover, large shopping centres are designed to meet the demands of public. It is very handy approach for every one. people visited mall because after finishing shopping they can spend their quality time with their family and friends. Furthurmore, the mall have a cinema, food shops, game centre so public can have some fun and entertainment after spend their time in shopping, which will make them stress free also their children can play their while their parents are doing shopping.

To conclude, city malls make shopping easy, handy, less time consuming and stress free that is the reason people like to visit and also freshen up their mind.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the shift toward shopping malls is a positive development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention convenience and entertainment as benefits, the argument lacks depth and fails to acknowledge the counter-argument regarding the negative impact on local businesses, which is a key part of the prompt. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed examples and perhaps briefly address the opposing view to show a more balanced perspective. The ideas are relevant, but they remain at a surface level throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'To conclude' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear (e.g., 'the had to closed their businesses'). The logical progression is generally sound, but the transition between ideas within paragraphs could be smoother. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on common, repetitive phrasing such as 'shopping', 'buy', and 'things'. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'rom around' (roam around) and 'handy approach' (convenient approach). To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to urban development, consumer behavior, and economic impact. Using more precise synonyms and collocations will help you convey your ideas with greater sophistication and clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('people became', 'shopping trend also change'), incorrect verb forms ('would to buy', 'had to closed'), and missing articles. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with run-on sentences. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on sentence construction and proofreading for basic tense and agreement errors will significantly improve your score.

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