Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The concept of shopping in large shopping malls or centres has sparked significant discussion. I firmly believe that this is positive development in our society.

This perspective becomes clear when examining the convenience of the customers. For example, When there is bad weather condition, shopping centres allows the customers to shop in a safer environment without being affected by the severe weather situations. Another striking benefit in this regard is that it also provides multiple choices to the people with varieties of brands. Categorically discussing, it cannot be ignored that the main reason behind this is that it gives the customers the freedom to cross match the prices and get the best deals out of it. Moreover, it enables the family to shop and entertain children at the same time as they have the facilities like childrens park which makes the parents feel more safer for kids as it is guided by the securities and under camera surveillance which enables a peaceful shopping exeperience. Nonetheless, Shopping malls also has cinema theaters and food court which act as whole day picnic package.

Analyzing the statement and explaining further, the reason behind the shut down of small local shops is due to the failure of providing different collections of products and also as the shops are runned by the local people, they lack financial stability to stock more items thereby falls to follow the trend.

To put it in a nutshell, after considering all these points it can be inferred that large shopping centres are the best positive development that happend in our society which offers more practical and beneficial for the people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have clearly stated your position that the rise of shopping malls is a positive development. You provided several relevant arguments, such as convenience, variety, and family-friendly facilities. However, the response could be improved by addressing the 'negative' side of the argument more thoroughly to provide a more balanced discussion, as the prompt asks for your opinion on the development as a whole. While you mention why local shops close, this is presented as a secondary point rather than a counter-argument. The ideas are generally well-supported, but some points, such as the 'whole day picnic package,' could be expanded further to demonstrate a more sophisticated level of task development.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'For example,' 'Another striking benefit,' and 'To put it in a nutshell,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. Additionally, the paragraphing is a bit unbalanced; the second paragraph is quite long and contains multiple distinct ideas that could have been separated for better clarity. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single main idea would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'significant discussion,' 'categorically,' and 'surveillance.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'cross match the prices' (compare prices) and 'falls to follow the trend' (fails to follow). There are also minor spelling errors like 'exeperience' and 'childrens' (missing apostrophe). To reach a higher band, you should aim to use less common lexical items more precisely and ensure that your collocations sound natural to a native speaker.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'shopping centres allows' (subject-verb agreement), 'makes the parents feel more safer' (double comparative), 'shops are runned' (incorrect past participle), and 'happened in our society which offers more practical' (missing subject/relative clause error). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct formation of passive voice will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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