Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the last few years, some people are buying products from giant superstores or malls so that the small shops are getting closed. I think it is impacting negatively the economy and this essay will discuss the reasons.

There are many reasons for people going to purchase items from shopping centers. First of all, everything will be available in one place. For instance, if a person wants to buy products such as cosmetics, dresses and groceries or they need entertainments namely food and cinema, it will be accessible inside that particular building. As a result, once they enter that mall, they do not need to drive to another places. Furthermore, most of the famous brands has its branch in the shopping centers. Consequently, people who are very fond of using only branded items will end in this type of places. There will be lot of options for people since shopping malls has all types of branded items.

This trend will have negative effects the society. Firstly, local people will have no other choice other than closing their stores, since they will not have enough customers. For example, a locally owned textile shop will have less walk-in customer than the shop in the malls. This will lead to less profit margin and eventually they will be in debt. Secondly, the items which we buy from the shopping area are more costlier than in the local shop. This will make the life of a common man very difficult and cost of living will increase.

To conclude, purchasing items from the shopping malls will give flexibility and availability along with high cost of living.in my opinion, it having a negative effect because it is affecting the lives of common people not in a good way.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by identifying the trend as a negative development. The ideas are relevant, such as the convenience of malls versus the economic struggle of local shops. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about 'cost of living' is mentioned but not fully explained or supported with a clear logical link to the closure of small shops. The position is clear throughout, but the essay would benefit from more nuanced exploration of the economic impact beyond just profit margins and debt to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'First of all', 'For instance', 'Furthermore', and 'Consequently'. However, some of these are used mechanically or slightly incorrectly, such as 'end in this type of places' or 'will have no other choice other than closing'. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the transition between the benefits of malls and the negative impact on society could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body, and conclusion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the student to convey their meaning clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'profit margin', 'textile shop', and 'cost of living'. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'will end in this type of places' (should be 'end up shopping in these places') and 'more costlier' (a double comparative error). The range is sufficient for the task but lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('most of the famous brands has', 'shopping malls has'), article usage ('the shopping area'), and comparative errors ('more costlier'). Punctuation is generally functional, though there are minor issues with spacing and sentence boundaries, such as 'cost of living.in my opinion'. These errors do not impede communication but occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score.

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