Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The trend of shopping from malls and large shopping centres is gradually increased in recent years, as a result, a number of local shops have been closed. I believe that, shopping from malls may help people in getting all things under one roof but I think people should support local markets as much as they can. So, that they can also afford basic lifestyle.

The first and foremost reason why people starts moving to malls for shopping is status. To explain it, many people believe that if they shop from small business owners people may think they cannot afford to buy from big shopping centres. Hence, for showing off their wealth, people like to go to bigger shops. For example, people follow the trends like sharing their whole day on internet. For these vlogging they may visit malls to show people. Another one is for bigger purchases like such as shop to another country or for any family. people may choose shopping malls. I think this is good option.

On the other hand, I believe that for some purchases it is better to shop from malls But for daily needs people should make purchase from local market. This could be helpful for both seller and the buyer. To illustrate, if people start buying fruit and vegetable as well some basic household things from local shops, they may get more quality as well as quatity. In addition to this the shop owner may afford their basic needs with that money. Furthermore, the fruits, vegetable and milk people get from shopping centres is also imported to shopping centres from these local shop or land owners. for example, some people grow their crops and sell it to shopping centres in less price. Because they think people will not get from them at same price.

In conclusion, In my opinion, sometimes shopping from malls is better option but for basic needs, people should promote local business owners. So, that they can afford better lifestyle. And this will also help the nation in reducing poverty line.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the shift from local shops to malls and providing a clear opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The argument regarding 'status' and 'vlogging' is interesting but lacks depth, and the explanation of how local shops supply malls is slightly confusing and under-developed. While you maintain a consistent position throughout, the supporting arguments could be more logically structured and expanded to fully explore the implications of this development. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is clearly linked to the core question of whether this trend is positive or negative.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use some cohesive devices like 'The first and foremost reason', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' to signal transitions. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and the internal flow within paragraphs is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing or sentence fragments (e.g., 'So, that they can also afford basic lifestyle'). Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the logical progression between sentences could be smoother to ensure a more cohesive overall argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'vlogging', 'household things', and 'poverty line'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'shopping from malls is gradually increased' (should be 'has gradually increased') and 'quatity' (spelling error). You attempt to use some less common vocabulary, but the lack of precision occasionally hinders the sophistication of your argument. Focusing on accurate collocations and refining your spelling will help improve your score in this area.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb tenses ('people starts moving'), article usage, and sentence fragments. For example, 'So, that they can also afford basic lifestyle' is an incomplete thought. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary commas and capitalization issues. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent the response from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and predicate.

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