Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this modern world, shopping has become very convenient due to new malls opening across the world.

In past years, a lot of new malls have been opened and due to that small shops are getting closed. In this writing, before going to conclusion, we will discuss both views whether it is a positive or negative development.

Initiating with the benefits of big malls, first and foremost benefit is that big malls have made shopping easier as most of the things can be found at a single location. People do not have to travel from one place to another to buy a different thing as they can find it at same mall in different shop. For example, people going to malls can buys there kitchen tools and bathroom supplies at the same location without spending extra time on travelling. Thus, this type of development is saving time for people.

On the other hand, some drawbacks which are making it problematic are that sales of small and local shop owners are decreasing as people prefer to buy from big malls. Due to this, many local shops are getting closed, which indirectly lead to unemployment of shop owners. Secondly, anything people buy from big malls is way more expensive as compared to local shops. In addition to this, due to reduced number of local shops, it is getting difficult for middle class buyer to do shopping which leaves them with no option other than malls. As result, malls are leading to unemployment and inflation.

In conclusion to the above statements, neither of the pros can be neglected nor the cons. It is a mixed bag of positives and negatives. In my opinion, it is mostly the negative development as it is resulting in inflation and reduced employment, however it can be managed if government apply some laws to limits malls.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the benefits and drawbacks of large shopping centres. However, the position is not fully clear until the conclusion. While the prompt asks for a clear opinion, the introduction states 'we will discuss both views', which is a common error in IELTS essays; you should state your position clearly from the start. The ideas are relevant, such as convenience versus local unemployment, but they could be more deeply developed with more specific examples. For instance, the point about inflation is mentioned but not fully explained or supported with a clear logical link to the rise of malls.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use cohesive devices such as 'first and foremost', 'on the other hand', and 'in addition to this' to link your points. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical or repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved by using more varied linking phrases rather than relying on simple sequence markers. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the benefits and drawbacks, which helps the reader follow your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, such as 'convenient', 'problematic', and 'unemployment'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, you write 'getting closed' instead of 'closing down' or 'being shut down'. You also use 'buys' instead of 'buy' and 'middle class buyer' instead of 'middle-class shoppers'. To reach a higher band, you should aim for more precise vocabulary and avoid repeating basic words like 'things' or 'shop'. The range is sufficient to communicate your ideas, but it lacks the precision required for higher scores.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'due to that small shops are getting closed' (should be 'as a result, small shops are closing') and 'if government apply some laws' (should be 'if the government applies'). There are also minor errors with articles and pluralisation, such as 'in past years' (should be 'in recent years'). Despite these errors, the meaning is generally clear, and the mistakes do not significantly impede communication. Increasing your control over subject-verb agreement and article usage will improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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