Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In this era of globalization, the huge shopping centres are growing exceptionally. However, the small scale business have been observing decline in their demand. Thus, some people consider this change as positive while others believe that it is impacting negatively. Both merits and demerits of this change along with my opinion will be discussed in upcoming paragraphs.

The numerous benefits of malls are mentioned as below. First and foremost is a bunch of options customers are getting in malls. Consumers are getting options for a product varies from different companies, prices, quality, quantity and much more. Thus, they can compare the products at a single place and get a optimum quality at a cheaper price. For example, consumers can visit a mall to buy laptop where they can compare laptops with varied features and prices from different companies rather than going to an individual company stores. Further, it will save time as well as efforts of people for visiting distinct places for many products. Again the customers will get the quality product at best price due to competition at malls and not like monopolistic local vendors. In this way above are the few positive points of mall development.

On the other hand, there are also repercussions of this development. Firstly, it is negatively impacting small scale local vendors. The domestic vendors play a cardinal role in economic development of the country by making the products domestically and contribute to development of nation by paying tax on sales of products. While the shopping centres encourage sale of international products which provides high margin on profits. For an instance, many malls have electronic products from China which are cheaper and high margins. This import from other countries ruin the domestic market.

To conclude, I believe that mall development is absolutely great change as it's benefits outweigh it's demerits. The repercussions of the same can be solved by better market policy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task, providing both positive and negative aspects of the trend. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the benefits of malls are well-supported with examples like laptop shopping, the negative impact on local vendors is less thoroughly explored. The argument regarding 'better market policy' in the conclusion is vague and lacks specific detail. To reach a higher band, ensure that both sides of the argument are developed with equal depth and that your concluding thoughts provide a more concrete summary of your reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'First and foremost', 'Further', and 'On the other hand' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as the phrase 'In this way above are the few positive points', which is somewhat awkward. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that the flow between sentences is more natural and less repetitive.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'globalization', 'repercussions', 'cardinal role', and 'monopolistic'. There are some instances of slightly unnatural word choices or minor errors, such as 'a optimum quality' (should be 'an optimum') and 'it's benefits' (should be 'its'). While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, some phrases are slightly clunky, such as 'observing decline in their demand'. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, but more precise collocations and a higher level of sophistication would be needed for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors throughout the text, such as 'the small scale business have been observing' (subject-verb agreement), 'a bunch of options customers are getting' (informal phrasing), and 'For an instance' (incorrect article usage). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor slips. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and refining your control over complex sentence structures to ensure they are error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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