Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

From very few year as we all see that big shopping centres and malls are more famous as compared to small local shops. This leads to little growing shops are now closed. According to me this change has both positive and negatives development in many ways.

From the positive perspective we see that we got all our essential items from one place and we never waste our time to go one shop to another this is big plus point. Also, if big shopping centers open then these shopping center need staff for their business to run so this is helping to generate more jobs. For example, in big shopping Centre all the things are display openly so customer early gets all things from one place and never hesitated for price for bragging

As we see that when we are at younger age, we notice every street of city have its own little grocery, cloth, sports, bakeries etc. shops which is good for us in many perspectives. Small business help city to grow and make things easy in different manners as affordable price, no time consuming as these shops are nearby us. Small shops and business help people to equally but big shopping malls now take these positions and only big private company take benefits.

In conclusion, as our generation change and become more modern, they are more interested in shopping from big attractive malls. These leads to barrier and close small business. But small shops are more strong part of our society if it complexly finishes then no new ideas of business are help people to survive

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of the shift toward large shopping centres. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention convenience and job creation as positives, and the loss of community and local business as negatives, the arguments lack depth and specific, well-explained examples. The phrase 'never hesitated for price for bragging' is unclear and does not effectively support your point. To improve, ensure that each main idea is supported by a clear, logical explanation rather than just listing points. Your position is stated in the introduction, but the conclusion is slightly repetitive and lacks a strong final summary of your stance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'From very few year as we all see' and 'As we see that when we are at younger age' are awkward transitions that do not effectively link ideas. The progression of ideas within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the jump from convenience to job creation feels abrupt. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') and ensure that each sentence flows logically from the previous one.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'big', 'small', and 'good', which limits the sophistication of your argument. There are also instances of word-choice errors, such as 'little growing shops' instead of 'small, independent retailers' and 'complexly finishes' instead of 'completely disappears'. Some phrases are non-idiomatic, which occasionally forces the reader to guess your meaning. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to economics, urban development, and consumer behaviour, and focus on using words in their correct collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'these shopping center need'), incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'as our generation change'), and missing articles or prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several run-on sentences that lack necessary commas or conjunctions. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that tense usage is consistent across the essay.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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