Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Nowadays, many local shops have closed because people prefer to go to large shopping centres and malls for their shopping. Although this development has some advantages, I believe that it is mostly a negative development because it can cause unemployment and harm small local businesses.

On the one hand, large shopping centres have some benefits for customers. Firstly, they provide many different products and services in one place. This makes shopping easier and more convenient for people. For example, a large shopping mall may have clothing shops, supermarkets, restaurants and entertainment areas. Therefore, people can buy different things and enjoy other activities without travelling to different places. Secondly, customers can find many famous international brands and compare different products and prices.

On the other hand, the closure of local shops can cause several problems. The main disadvantage is that it can lead to unemployment. Small shops may not be able to compete with large shopping centres, so they may have to close and their workers may lose their jobs. In addition, local businesses may have fewer opportunities to grow. Local products may also become less popular because customers mainly buy products from large companies and international brands. For example, a small local food producer may struggle to sell its products when customers choose products from large supermarkets. Local products can also be fresher because they are usually produced and sold within the local area.

In conclusion, large shopping centres provide convenience and a wide variety of products, which is beneficial for customers. However, I believe that the closure of local shops is a negative development because it can increase unemployment and reduce the growth of local businesses.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

You have clearly addressed all parts of the prompt, providing a balanced view while maintaining a consistent position that the trend is negative. Your ideas are relevant and supported by logical reasoning, such as the link between the closure of small shops and unemployment. To reach a higher band, you could further develop your arguments by exploring the social impact on local communities or the environmental consequences of increased travel to malls, which would add more depth to your analysis.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices effectively, such as 'On the one hand,' 'Firstly,' and 'In addition,' which help guide the reader through your arguments. The progression of ideas is logical, moving from the benefits of malls to the drawbacks for local businesses. To improve, ensure that the transition between the benefits and the negative impacts is even smoother, perhaps by using a more sophisticated contrastive link to bridge the two sides of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas clearly. Phrases like 'compete with,' 'international brands,' and 'struggle to sell' are used accurately. However, the vocabulary is somewhat functional and lacks the 'less common' items that would elevate the response to a higher band. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations or topic-specific terminology, such as 'economic viability,' 'consumer habits,' or 'commercial landscape,' to show a more sophisticated command of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

Your grammar is generally accurate, and you use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures effectively. Most of your sentences are error-free, and your control over punctuation is good. There are no significant errors that impede communication. To achieve a higher score, you should aim to incorporate a wider variety of complex grammatical structures, such as conditional sentences (e.g., 'If local shops were to disappear, the community would lose its unique character') or passive voice constructions to vary your sentence rhythm and demonstrate greater flexibility.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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