Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Its a issue of debate that nowadays small shops are replaced by a bigger one or malls due to people choice. This essay highlight the both positive and negatives into upcoming notions .

To begin with, there are enormous benefits of shopping from small shops because its affordable for local or poor people who are not able to purchase things from malls. In other words, on local shops sell product on cheap price which can good for poor people. For example, In India nowadays have more than 50% local shops than malls because it provide income to people. Apart from that local shops provide jobs to people and can earn handsome money and enhance their economic level.

On the other hand, Large shopping centre provide both quality and quantity while, products are expensive. From malls people can buy thing of any brand and all things are available under one roof have no need to go on different shops .In other word in large shops the price of product are fixed individual do not need to bargain .For Example, today in every corner of city have more than 2-3 malls where people can purchase anything according to their choice. and this service provide to pay by credit and debit people have no need to carry hard money with them.

In Conclusion, although there are enormous benefits of large shops, people cannot ignore the importance of small shops which provide income and affordability to poor people. In my viewpoint, small shops play a crucial role to enhance economic level of nation and help enhance financial level of people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the issue, but the position is not clearly maintained throughout. While you mention both positive and negative aspects, the essay lacks a strong, consistent stance. The ideas are relevant, such as affordability and job creation for small shops versus convenience and quality for malls, but they are somewhat under-developed. To improve, ensure that your introduction clearly states your opinion and that each body paragraph directly supports that position rather than simply listing pros and cons. The conclusion should also more effectively synthesize your arguments to reinforce your initial viewpoint.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'To begin with', 'On the other hand', 'In other word'). There are also instances where the flow between sentences is abrupt, such as the transition between the benefits of malls and the mention of payment methods. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that referencing (using pronouns or synonyms to refer back to previous ideas) is more precise to improve the overall flow of your arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic descriptors like 'good', 'cheap', and 'handsome money'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'upcoming notions' and 'hard money' (instead of 'cash'). To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to economics and consumer behavior, such as 'convenience', 'market competition', 'economic viability', or 'consumer accessibility'. Expanding your range of synonyms will help you avoid repetitive phrasing and make your writing more engaging.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'its a issue', 'local shops provide... and can earn'), missing articles, and punctuation errors. For instance, 'In other word in large shops the price of product are fixed' contains multiple errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Additionally, try to vary your sentence structure by using more complex clauses correctly, ensuring that your punctuation supports the meaning of your sentences rather than obscuring it.

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