Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's fast- paced world, a large number of individuals prefer to do their shopping from enormous shopping outlets or malls rather than from small local shops. The trend of window shopping has been gone. This essay will not only discuss the positive impact of this trend but also elaborate the negative development.

Commencing with the most salient benefit of buying from shopping malls, it enables people to save plenty of time instead of doing all shopping from different shops. They can allocate their spare time to do multiple tasks such as spending quality time with family. For example, a large outlet helps to buy every essential goods from one place instead of visiting small shops. Moreover, the shopping centres have cinema hall and food area so that people can enjoy with their family and friends, which results in enhancing the standard of people's lives.

Despite the given merits, this trend has undesirable ramifications. The prominent demerit is the wastage of money. Owing to easy access to shopping individuals prefer to visit shopping malls without considering the spendings. For example, the local shops provide same goods on cheaper rate while shopping malls sells same on higher rate. However, Most of the people do shopping from malls to prove their living standards to others, which results an increase in spending on non- essential products.

To conclude, although shopping complexes offer a wide variety of products, convenience and entertainment, small shops provide personalized service. Therefore, I believe consumers should maintain a balance between the two rather than relying on shopping malls.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of the trend. However, the position is slightly contradictory; the introduction states the essay will discuss both, but the conclusion suggests a balance, which is a sound approach. The ideas are relevant, such as convenience and time-saving for the positive side, and financial impact for the negative. However, the development is somewhat superficial. For instance, the point about 'wastage of money' is a bit generalized, and the claim that local shops provide the 'same goods' at cheaper rates is an assertion that could have been better supported with more nuanced reasoning. Overall, the task is addressed, but the depth of analysis is limited.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Commencing with', 'Moreover', and 'Despite the given merits', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. The logical progression is generally clear, though the link between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother. Referencing is mostly accurate, but there are minor issues with flow, such as the abrupt shift between the benefits of malls and the drawbacks. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, with some attempts at using less common items like 'salient benefit', 'undesirable ramifications', and 'personalized service'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'every essential goods' (should be 'all essential goods') and 'sells same on higher rate' (should be 'sells them at a higher rate'). The range is sufficient to convey meaning clearly, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band. The repetition of 'shopping' and 'malls' also limits the lexical variety.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'The trend of window shopping has been gone' (should be 'is gone' or 'has disappeared'), 'results in enhancing' (should be 'results in the enhancement of'), and 'results an increase' (should be 'results in an increase'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are minor errors in article usage and prepositional phrases. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. A wider range of error-free complex structures would be needed for a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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