Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Due to urbanization, small local shops are being replaced by supermarkets and shopping centres. This development has both positive and negative effects in society. In further paragraphs, I will be discussing both the trends and giving my opinion.

On the positive side megacities and supercities demands big shopping malls where people can visit a single place to purchase any commodities. Moreover, supermarkets attract numbers of consumers and big brands that ultimately increases the business for shop owners. For instance, window shopping is very popular among youngsters nowadays. Additionally, having all the shops at one place reduces the need for local shops that utilizes more ground space in cities which can later be used for other redevelopment of the cities.

On the downgrade side, due to development of shopping centres local shopkeepers are facing lose in their business as most of the consumers gets divert to big malls. Although local shop owners also have a opportunity to open their shop in malls but it might demand high investment or rental installments. For example, due to urbanization in Scarborough, 48% of local shop owners had to close their shops due to non-profit business. In addition, some malls are not planned accordingly due to which their might be a problem with car parking, which leads to frequent traffic jams and accidents.

I personally believe although there are two sides of these, construction of big malls has more advantages as it provide more in the society in terms of business, utilizes limited land, attracts more national and international brands in cities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the negative impact is supported by a specific example (Scarborough), the positive arguments are more general and rely on assertions like 'window shopping is very popular' without fully explaining how this benefits society beyond convenience. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with logical reasoning. The prompt asks for a judgment on whether this is a positive or negative development; you have provided this, but the depth of analysis could be improved by exploring the social consequences of losing local community hubs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the positive side', 'Moreover', and 'In addition', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, though the flow between sentences within paragraphs could be smoother. For instance, the transition from the benefits of malls to the redevelopment of land is a bit abrupt. Overall, the structure is coherent, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing for clear communication. You use some topic-specific terms like 'urbanization', 'commodities', and 'redevelopment'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'On the downgrade side' (instead of 'On the negative side'), 'facing lose' (should be 'loss'), and 'gets divert' (should be 'are diverted'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your expression. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and ensuring the correct form of words is used in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and pluralization, such as 'supercities demands' (should be 'demand'), 'utilizes' (should be 'utilize'), and 'there might be a problem' (you wrote 'their'). Additionally, 'although there are two sides of these' is grammatically incomplete. While these errors are noticeable, they rarely prevent the reader from understanding your meaning. Increasing the accuracy of your verb forms and proofreading for basic agreement errors would significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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