Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A remarkable surge in the shopping centres Or multinational shopping companies are observed across metropolitan cities, resultingly causing decline in local shops. This development has impacted both positively and negatively. The essay will explore both negative and positive impacts on an individual and social levels with reasons and examples.

Admittedly, the burgeoning growth of malls or shopping centers in the metropolitan cities made easier for the citizens to shop at one space offering multiple options. Secondly, the availability of the branded items under the same roof offer items much more easily than searching for the same product locally. Moreover, parking availability in shopping centres reduces traffic strain on roads. Additionally, multinational shopping malls offer employment with better salary and filing taxes much more efficiently , benefitting both individuals and government levels. Hence, the shopping malls has widespread appeal among citizens, providing positive impact.

Nevertheless, the malls provide benefit to government and individuals but offer detrimental impact on local community for shopping. The loss of individuality of local shops has diminishing effect on it. Secondly, the social pressure on middle class families to buy from expensive mall has stretched pockets. For instance, the surge in inflation has affected middle class and poor family , pressurized them to keep up to the social levels. Moreover, the mushrooming trend of shopping at malls strained the traffic on local roads.

In conclusion, the widespread appeal for the shopping centre has largely impacted both negatively and positively, but the predominant remained positive one. Government should impose laws on multinational shopping malls and local shops to create balance between both so the individuality would not be lost for the both.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument, acknowledging the positive and negative impacts of shopping malls. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the point about 'filing taxes' is mentioned but not clearly linked to the local shop context, and the argument regarding 'social pressure' is introduced but lacks a deep explanation of why this is a negative development for society as a whole. While a position is stated, the conclusion is slightly contradictory by suggesting the trend is 'predominantly positive' while also calling for government intervention to protect local shops. To reach a higher band, you should ensure each point is fully extended with more specific reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use cohesive devices such as 'Admittedly,' 'Secondly,' 'Moreover,' and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is slightly disrupted by awkward phrasing, such as 'resultingly causing decline.' Referencing is generally clear, but the connection between the final recommendation and the preceding arguments could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'burgeoning,' 'multinational,' 'detrimental,' and 'mushrooming.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'resultingly causing decline' (should be 'resulting in a decline') and 'strained the traffic' (should be 'increased traffic congestion'). While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, these minor errors occasionally affect the precision of your expression. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, but more precise collocations would improve the overall quality.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('the shopping malls has widespread appeal') and missing articles ('the middle class and poor family'). Punctuation is generally functional, though there are some awkward placements of commas. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic agreement and article usage, and try to incorporate more varied complex sentence structures with greater accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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