Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.
Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is not deniable ,in the recent time, many people to go large shopping centres and malls for their shopping rather then small local shops. I will firmly believe that it is a positive development for people. But i will discuss both both benefits and drawbacks in upcoming paragraphs with relevant examples.
It is true , there are a plethora of positive development behind this statement. First and foremost , large shopping centres and malls are convenient for everyone. To justify this, when people go to malls and they can pick up everything under the on roof, because all stores are available over there. they can buy all stuff such as clothes, groceries, home appliances etc. As a result, they save their time also they can save their money because sometime they provide discounts on the things which is good for people.
On the flip side , there are some drawbacks to this tendency because it may be affect the local stores which have closed now. To explain it , it is difficult for poor people they cannot afford large shopping centres and malls also it is not good for local shops man due to this, small local shops person loose their business and they cannot earn money because people do not buy things over there. for instance, I conducted a survey in 2020 in New Delhi , which showed 70% of people go to shopping centres and malls for shopping instead of local shops.
,Hammering the last nail, replacing local stores with the large shopping centres and malls is a problem for poor people they cannot afford money ,but it is easy for affordable person ,they can buy everything in one place which is save them money and time.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the convenience of malls and the negative impact on local shops. However, the position is inconsistent; the introduction states it is a 'positive development,' but the body paragraphs provide a balanced view without a clear, sustained argument. The ideas are relevant but often under-developed, such as the claim that poor people cannot afford malls, which lacks a clear explanation of why this is the case. To reach a higher band, you should maintain a clear stance throughout and provide more detailed, logical support for your arguments rather than listing points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed. While some cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'First and foremost', 'On the flip side'), they are occasionally used incorrectly or in a mechanical way. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the final paragraph where the connection between the 'survey' and the conclusion is weak. The use of punctuation is inconsistent, with frequent errors in comma placement and spacing, which disrupts the flow of the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There is some repetition of basic terms like 'shopping centres', 'malls', and 'local shops'. Some word choices are awkward or incorrect, such as 'local shops man' and 'affordable person'. There are also instances of word-form errors, such as 'which is save them money'. To improve, you should focus on using more sophisticated collocations and ensuring that words are used in the correct grammatical context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences often contain grammatical errors. Frequent issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'people to go', 'it may be affect'), missing articles, and incorrect verb tenses. Punctuation is a significant issue, with many sentences lacking proper structure or containing unnecessary commas. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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