Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, numerous local shops have had to be shut down due to increasingly select to purchasing from bigger outlets such as shopping malls and shopping centers. Although this trend may offer a wider range of products, I believe it is a largely negative development because it can be detrimental to local area development and small businesses.

The primary reason why this is a negative development is the bad consequences for the residents, as local shops are being forced to close because there would be no customers. For instance, if there is no customers are coming to make purchases. A small business manager has no requirement to get help from someone; if he does not want to get help from someone, there is no job opportunity for the local people. This leads to weak relations towards local people.

Another significant concern is the impact on small business owners, who may not be able to arrange wider variety of customers because of the expensive budget. It is hard for the manager to buy expensive products to compete with the bigger shopping malls. For instance, a person who just started their small business and invests all capital to build a local shop would be hardship to run their household needs.

In conclusion, although shopping centers can provide a wider range of products, I believe that the shutting down of local shops is a predominantly negative development. Due to reasons of effect on local communities as well as small business owners.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the trend is negative. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments regarding job opportunities and business costs are repetitive and lack depth. Furthermore, the response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the ability to fully develop the response. While the position is consistent, the lack of sufficient length and the somewhat simplistic nature of the supporting arguments prevent a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as the awkward phrasing 'For instance, if there is no customers are coming'. The transition between ideas is sometimes abrupt, and the logical flow is hindered by grammatical errors that make sentences difficult to parse. While there is an overall attempt at a logical progression, the lack of sophisticated linking words and the repetitive structure of the paragraphs limit the coherence of the piece.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'increasingly select to purchasing' and 'arrange wider variety of customers'. The phrasing 'expensive budget' is also imprecise. While the meaning is generally clear, the limited range of vocabulary and the frequent errors in word choice restrict the score. To improve, you should focus on learning collocations and using more precise terminology related to business and economics.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'if there is no customers are coming', 'a person who just started their small business... would be hardship', and 'Due to reasons of effect on local communities'. These errors often impede the flow of the text. While the meaning is usually understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic subject-verb agreement and sentence construction prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. More attention to proofreading and basic grammar rules is necessary.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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