Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent times, many petite shops that operates locally have shutdown as customers are preferring to visit large shopping malls for purchasing the products or services. I will discuss more about the reason why I believe it is a positive trend in the following paragraphs.

Shopping Plazas will be beneficial in many ways. First, a variety of products will be available in the same building which will save commute time that one spends on visiting different locations. Individual shops are most focus on the single product whereas malls have variety of options as well as brand at one location. Sometime when you wish to shop for a variety of things like clothing accessories, shoes, or mobile phone, shopping centres is the best option to choose. Another advantage is that, malls have various other facilities like the food court, Video gaming and cinemas that will help you to relax and spend time with your friends and family after completing your shopping.

Additionally, you can see many different shops selling the same types of products. For example, you can access Zara, H&M or Old navy for clothing accessories in the same location. This will enable you to compare the price as well as quality before buying. This will not only provide you with satisfaction but also make you aware of different options that you can consider while shopping.

To sum up, this a positive trend because shopping centres provide many variety of products and services that individual shops may not have. Further it also provide option for exploring other leisure activities like watching movie or playing games.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the trend is positive. The main ideas—convenience, variety, and leisure facilities—are relevant. However, the development is somewhat limited. While you mention that malls offer variety, the discussion could be deepened by contrasting this more effectively with the specific benefits of local shops, which are currently ignored. The response is a bit repetitive in its focus on 'variety' and 'options.' To reach a higher band, ensure that you fully explore the implications of your arguments rather than just listing features of shopping malls.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'First,' 'Another advantage,' and 'Additionally' to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel slightly forced. Referencing is generally clear, but the connection between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother. The conclusion effectively summarizes your position, though it introduces the idea of 'leisure activities' again, which is already well-covered in the body. Overall, the structure is coherent and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'commute time,' 'satisfaction,' and 'leisure activities.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'petite shops' (small/local shops is more natural) and 'most focus on' (mostly focus on). There are also minor errors in word form, such as 'many variety' (a wide variety). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. Expanding your range of collocations would significantly improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('shops that operates,' 'malls have various other facilities... that will help you'), and minor punctuation or article errors. While these errors are noticeable, they do not impede communication. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage. You have attempted some complex structures, but they are not always error-free. Increasing the frequency of error-free complex sentences will help you move toward a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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