Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In today's world, people prefer to visit large shopping malls instead of shop at local shops due to this, a lot small shops are closed. According to me this is positive development, reason behind this will discussed in the following paragraphs.

To begin with, the first and foremost reason behind this, it can save people's time. To explain this, in large shopping center everything can be find under one roof such as grocery, clothing and home applinces. people have variety to choose from as in malls there is a lot of international brand, which will durable for years. Moreover, there is also special place for vehicle to park, in this way there is no blockage on streets.

Last but not least, shopping complax can create employment for a lot of people. Because a large place eed a lot person to maintain. there is a lot of shops, where people hire 4 to 5 person for a single shop in order to serve their costomer well. As well as, there is security guard, at every department such as in parking, grocery and food court, who make sure there is not any type of shop lifting. For instance, a survey was conducted in Elanta mall chandigarh , when this mall open , this provides employment to around35% people , who were unemployed for long time.

To sum up, shopping at big mall can give employment to a large chunk of people. And this can save shhopers time by providing all goods under one roof.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the shift toward shopping malls is a positive development. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention time-saving and employment, the arguments lack depth and rely on simple assertions. For instance, the example of the Elanta mall is relevant, but the explanation of how malls impact local shops is underdeveloped. To improve, you should provide a more balanced view or a more thorough exploration of the consequences of local shop closures to fully meet the requirements for a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'To sum up'. However, the flow is often interrupted by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. Some sentences are linked in a way that feels repetitive or disjointed, such as the transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph. The use of referencing is occasionally unclear, which makes the progression of ideas feel slightly forced rather than natural.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but remains quite basic. You use some topic-specific words like 'employment', 'unemployed', and 'international brand', but there is a lack of variety and precision. There are several spelling errors (e.g., 'applinces', 'complax', 'shhopers') and word choice issues (e.g., 'which will durable' instead of 'which are durable'). To reach a higher band, you need to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary and use it with greater accuracy and collocation awareness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures. While there are attempts at complex sentences, they are frequently marred by grammatical errors, such as 'reason behind this will discussed' (passive voice error) and 'a lot small shops are closed' (missing 'of'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage and capitalization. The frequency of these errors is high enough to cause some difficulty for the reader, although the overall meaning remains understandable. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and sentence construction will help improve your score.

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