Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, many people prefer to do shopping from the large commercial shopping centers, as a result small local shops forced to closed. I believe that the closure of local shops is negative development for local communities and business owners.

One major disadvantage is that local shops play an crucial role for their local communities. It is important to grow the economy chain. Local shops help to nearby living, where people can buy the product easily especially, older people not to travel to far to buy the products. However, closure of the local shops business harm to owners with their employment opportunity. For instance, having local shops clothing business can not compete to the big mall which sell the branded clothes with the cheapest price in a sale.

Secondly, Large shopping malls have different variety of the products with the cheapest price which is convenient for people that they can buy variety of the product from the one place also there are other facilities available such as, parking, cinemas and game zones. Therefore, Most of the people attract to the big malls for the shopping. Growing dominance of these centers make neighborhood less lively and forced people particularly, elder people have to go too far for shopping for basic necessities.

In conclusion, although big malls have variety of the products with cheapest prices and it is convenient for people to buy the product, I consider closure of the local shops business is a negative development, in my view local communities should support local businesses while still benefiting from the facilities offered from the larger big centers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the closure of local shops is a negative development. The ideas are relevant, such as the impact on elderly residents and the loss of employment opportunities. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited. For example, the argument regarding the 'economy chain' is vague and lacks specific explanation. While the response covers all parts of the task, the supporting arguments could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes the position while acknowledging the counter-argument regarding the convenience of large malls.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'One major disadvantage', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Local shops help to nearby living'. Additionally, there are instances where the flow between sentences is slightly disjointed, particularly in the first body paragraph. Despite these minor issues, the overall progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at using topic-specific vocabulary, such as 'commercial shopping centers', 'employment opportunity', and 'basic necessities'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are occasional errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'forced to closed' (should be 'forced to close') and 'having local shops clothing business' (which is phrased awkwardly). The repetition of simple phrases like 'cheapest price' and 'variety of the products' suggests a need for more varied and sophisticated lexical items.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'small local shops forced to closed' (missing auxiliary verb), 'people not to travel to far' (incorrect infinitive usage), and 'Most of the people attract to the big malls' (passive voice error). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some issues with comma usage and sentence fragments. The control of grammar is sufficient for communication, but the frequency of errors prevents a higher score.

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