Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In contemporary world, many people view development of huge malls as positive progress but negelects the consequences it brings along with it. Mega centers are often the reason local retailer loss their business and eventually shut down. In my prespective, this is negative development and in followinf essay I will explain how it outweighs positive development.

To begin with construction aspects, these shopping centre requires large scale lot which is not readily available in major cities. To make it possible, numerous people have to shut down their business or are displaced due to forceful selling of their shops and houses. Consequences does not stop here but is strecthed over the years with contruction requiring street closures and noise pollution experienced by nearby residents. Due to dirt and noise of machines operating, several people develop or face increased health related issues during the span of construction.

Aftermath of construction might seem as positive development for large group of people with multinational companies stepping foot inside these shopping centres. Contrarily, local business runs out of business. From economic terms, these development means movement of money more into the hands of companies that are not local. Based on my personal knowledge, primary impact of these develpment eventually leads to reduced competition over the years as large companies will held on with huge financial backing. Once local businesses are unable to compete, cost everything that is sold in these centres increase sharply.

In conclusion, people can access multiple shops under on roof with malls but total exclsuion of local small shops will eventually result in disaster. These developments do results in heavy traffic which is often more headache people living in surrounding areas. I think government should pursue better plans to handle these developments by meeting demands where required rather than displacing local shops and residents.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position that the closure of small shops due to the rise of large malls is a negative development. The writer provides relevant supporting ideas, such as construction disruption, the displacement of local businesses, and long-term economic impacts including reduced competition and price increases. However, some arguments, particularly around the construction phase, are slightly digressive from the core socio-economic debate of shopping habits, and the ideas would benefit from deeper extension and more concrete real-world examples. Despite these minor limitations, all parts of the prompt are addressed, supporting a Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a clear overall progression. It begins with an introduction outlining the writer's stance, moves through distinct body paragraphs focusing on construction and economic impacts, and concludes with a summary statement. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'Contrarily', and 'In conclusion'. However, referencing and transitions are at times mechanical or somewhat abrupt, and paragraphing could be managed more smoothly. Minor lapses in cohesion prevent the text from reaching a higher band, placing it comfortably at Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student attempts a range of vocabulary suitable for the task, including terms like 'contemporary world', 'multinational companies', and 'socio-economic'. However, there are notable lexical errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, such as 'retailer loss their business' instead of 'retailers lose', 'In my prespective' instead of 'perspective', and 'followinf essay' instead of 'following essay'. While the writer demonstrates an adequate range to convey their message, these frequent slips in word formation and spelling restrict the score to Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay features a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as conditional and relative clauses ('Once local businesses are unable to compete...'). However, there are frequent grammatical errors and punctuation oversights throughout the response, including subject-verb agreement errors ('these shopping centre requires' instead of 'centre require', 'Consequence does not stop' instead of 'Consequences do not stop'), missing articles ('in contemporary world', 'in economic terms'), and awkward phrasing. These errors occasionally disrupt the reading flow, aligning the grammar with the Band 5.5 descriptors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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